Home Improvement

Title: Home Improvement

Author: Geonn

Fandom: Stargate SG-1

Characters: Jack O'Neill, Daniel Jackson, Sam Carter, Janet Fraiser

Pairings: Sam/Janet

Rating: Older Kids

Daniel shifted from one foot to the other, hands tucked under his arms as he waited in front of his apartment. He shivered and muttered to himself, "Yes, Jack, as a matter of fact, I do have plans this weekend. No, Jack, I don't care if you're feeling guilty." His teeth chattered and he nodded. "Yeah. Exactly what I should've said."

Sam kissed Janet Fraiser's neck, pinning her against the living room wall. "You're sure," Janet said, licking her lips and trying desperately trying to form coherent thoughts. "You're... sure that no one will interrupt us?"

Sam broke away from the apparently delicious taste of Janet's neck and smiled wickedly at her. "Oh, definitely. I told Colonel O'Neill I was helping you redecorate the living room and kitchen." She kissed Janet's lips. "He won't be within twenty miles of this place this weekend."

Jack leaned across the seats, opening the door and waiting patiently as Daniel hopped in. Daniel shuddered noisily and turned the vent so that it would blow directly on his frozen fingers. Jack glanced over and said, "You couldn't have waited in the lobby?"

"Shut up and drive," Daniel muttered.

"Little cranky this morning?" Jack asked.

"Yeah... I had to cancel my plans to go on a guilt trip with you."

Jack tsked and said, "Don't worry. That ancient civilization that died out a thousand years ago? It ain't comin' back before next weekend."

Daniel gave Jack a look that made the temperature outside seem downright balmy.

Janet was on her back on the couch, her hands under Sam's blouse. "Cassandra won't be back until tomorrow," she said around kisses.

"Perfect," Sam said, pulling at the buttons of Janet's blouse. "God, what are these, welded on?"

"Here, let me help," Janet breathed. Sam moved her hands and let Janet get the shirt undone.

Jack looked over his shoulder as he reversed down the street. "You've only been there about thirty times," Daniel said. "The mailbox is a barn that has a big FRAISER on top of it..."

"Maybe if someone hadn't been whining in my ear for the past three miles..."

He nearly rear-ended Carter's car as he slid into the driveway. He unfastened his seatbelt and pushed open the door. "Now come on. They're probably already pissed that we turned 'em down yesterday."

"We?" Daniel said. "You! You turned them down. They didn't ask me! I am guilt-free."

They walked up onto the front porch and Jack rang the doorbell. He inhaled, hooking his thumbs in his belt and rocking on his heels. "Yep. The ladies are gonna be thrilled to see us..."

Janet heard the doorbell, but muttered a curse at the mailman for not just leaving the box on the porch.

Sam would've seconded the grumble, but her hearing was a bit distorted by the thighs on either side of her head.

Besides... she was very focused on what she was doing.

"Sam said Janet's house, right?"

"I'm... pretty sure. I mean, look! Her car is right there." He walked to the edge of the porch and leaned out, looking down the driveway. "Fraiser's car is right there. They have to be here."

Daniel followed Jack to the edge of the porch. "Maybe they ran to Home Depot."

"In whose car?" Jack asked.

"Oh. Right."

Jack jumped the handrail and landed in Janet's roses. He cursed, jumping onto the asphalt of the driveway and looking to see if he'd done any permanent damage. Seeing nothing worse than boot prints in the dirt, he continued towards the back of the house. "Maybe they're doing some work on the gazebo out here."

He looked around the backyard as he entered, seeing nothing out of the ordinary. Also, no Air Force women working on their own in the cold. "Geez, it's freezing out here..."

"I didn't notice," Daniel griped.

Jack sighed and walked to the back door. "They could be upstairs. Maybe reorganizing a closet."

Daniel stayed on the grass, looking across at the gazebo.

Jack balanced on a lawn chair, cupping his hands around his face and leaning forward to peek into the kitchen. "Maybe they just... wait, I see Fraiser."

"What's she doing?" Daniel asked.

Jack frowned. "It's hard to say. It... looks like... she's sitting on the kitchen table."

"Why would she be sitting on th--"

"Oh, crap," Jack said, ducking down to below the window level.

"What?"

"I just saw Carter."

"So?"

Jack slid off the lawn chair and rushed to Daniel, grabbing him by the front of his sweatshirt and running back to the driveway. When they got back to the truck, Jack pulled open the driver's side and pushed Daniel in. He climbed in after him, forcing Daniel over the console and into the passenger side.

Once they were in the right places, Jack eased the door shut and turned the key. He winced at the roar his engine made and backed slowly out of the driveway. "Jack," Daniel said, finding himself whispering, "What was going on? What did you see?"

"Carter and Fraiser," Jack said. "They were... laying..."

"What, tile?"

"No... They were laying each other." He glanced at Daniel. "Is that the right tense?"

Daniel held his hands out in front of himself. "I don't even know what you're talking about. They were laying each other? What the hell does that even..." His eyes widened behind his glasses. "Wait. You don't mean..."

"I do."

"And you saw..."

"God," Jack muttered, covering his eyes with one hand.

"Jack."

"What?"

"Watch the road."

"Crap!" he pulled his hand away and focused on the road.

Daniel slumped back in his seat. "So you actually saw..."

"Stop makin' me think about it, Daniel!"

Daniel was quiet for a moment, then said, "Hey... if you had promised to help them redecorate, do you think--"

"Stop it."

"I'm just asking if you think they would've..."

"Daniel, I'm warning you..."

"I'm just saying there's a possibility that if you had said yes, they would have included you in the--"

Jack hit the brakes, squealing to a stop at a corner. He leaned across Daniel and opened the door. "Out!"

"Jack, I was just kid--"

"Out! Get out!"

Daniel sighed and climbed out of the truck. "It just crossed my mind!"

Jack slammed the door and pulled away from the curb, tires squealing. Daniel tucked his hands under his armpits, shaking his head and looking for a cab. "Yes, Jack, as a matter of fact, I do have plans this weekend. No, Jack, I don't care if you're feeling guilty. Yeah. Exactly what I should've said..."