Show: Alias

Title: If Only

Author: The Raven

Pairing: Sydney/Lauren

Summary: How it could have been, should have been, might have been... - Vignette -

Rating: R

Spoilers: Not really...

Feedback: nerocorvo@f-m.fm

Disclaimer: They are not mine, I'm just rubbing them together to see what happens. The story however, is mine...

Beta Reading: Soon! :)

Notes: The best thing they did for this show in a long time was add Lauren. In a less heterosexist world, I think they would have been a slammin' couple indeed... On another note, I am a bit of a twit when it comes to this show, but I shall try my best!

Sydney Bristow easily held her nemesis pinned against the cold, unyielding and most of all, unforgiving wall. Blinded by a rage that she could not and would not explain, she had simply broken under the stress of being in control and was not out of control...

Startled but unafraid eyes looked back at her, seeming borderline absurdly serene all things considered...

The dangerous moment passed and Sydney relaxed her grip marginally on Lauren Reed's neck, taking a deep breath as she did, aware suddenly at just how close she was to perhaps even killing the blonde woman.

The woman who had married the man she loved...

Sydney was smart enough to realise that she was not so angry about the loss of Michael, so much as mourning in a futile rage about the life she should have and might have had...

"Are you quite done?" Came the precise and calm tones of Lauren Reed as Sydney stared off into the space next to the blonde woman's head.

Snapping her attention back to the other woman, Sydney found herself examining Lauren intently, as if the woman somehow had the answers to the questions that Sydney did not even know how to ask, that she probably did even know herself.

Suddenly aware of the other woman on a visceral level, Sydney could only blink in confusion as she felt heat gather in her belly and without thinking, she pressed Lauren against the wall again, but this time her grip was on the blonde woman's clothing, not her throat.

Adrenalin and animal rage still warred in her body, clouding her thoughts in a miasma of hormones and Sydney was by now, moving in a purely instinctual fashion.

An instant passed, seeming to stretch over an aeon and then Sydney felt hands grip her, pull on her and a moment later, impossibly soft lips touched hers.

The reaction was instant, Sydney opened her mouth to Lauren's not-so-gentle probing and a half a dozen heartbeats later, they were kissing, consuming each other with a passion that was unbridled and fueled by desire alone. No intellectual or emotional niceties, thank you very much...

Dimly, Sydney became aware of hands questing to find away into her clothing the knowledge caused her to moan into the kiss as the blonde woman continued to make love to Sydney's mouth with her own.

Another beat passed and Sydney felt the almost painfully pleasurable invasion as Lauren pressed her fingers deep into Sydney's body. The action caused Sydney to wrench her mouth away Lauren's and she was unable to control her moan that bubbled up from her chest as those long fingers plundered her willing body.

It took only minutes, though the minutes stretched on for hours before Sydney felt herself tumble off the edge of her desire, the passion that Lauren evoked in her was so great.

The feeling of a strong arm encircling her, holding her up as her knees turned to rubber as her orgasm overwhelmed her, caused Sydney to melt into Lauren.

For just those brief seconds, Sydney felt completely safe, desired, at peace, simply for being herself and no one else...

Lifting her head, Sydney looked into the intelligent eyes of Lauren Reed, which blazed with a fire that caused Sydney to shiver, even as the woman's arrogant fingers still nestled within Sydney's body.

Sydney noted that the blonde woman's full lips were slightly bruised from the kisses they had shared and she could feel the vibration of tension in Lauren. Pulled tight like a bowstring, it would take very little to release that tension and all of a sudden, Sydney wanted nothing more than do do just that.

"I want you..." She whispered as Lauren's molten gaze caused fresh fire to ignite in Sydney's blood.

With those words, Sydney leaned in and kissed Lauren again and as they found each other, a small part of Sydney's brain pondered the possibility that maybe she could have the life she had dreamed about, with Lauren.

'If only...' Her mind whispered softly, just before Sydney lost all ability to think or talk altogether...

The End