Fandom: Harry Potter

Title: The Very Thought of You

Author: morte206@aol.com

Pairing: HG/FD

Disclaimers: The usual, I am not JKR, at least not according to my driver's license.

Feedback: I'd love it and should you feel inclined to give it, you can send it to Morte206@aol.com

Author Note:  A little plot bunny that came to me in a flash, kind of dark but then again it's like that sometimes.  

I try not to think of it, ever.

But I can't stop thinking of it, ever.

I was the Secret Keeper.

I try not to hear it, the way you cried, how you begged, and finally, how you offered yourself in my stead.

But I can't, over and over the morbid mantra of my guilt mocks me, echoes through my head.

I try not to sleep.  When I sleep I see your face, your never wavering gaze as they violated you, brutalized you.  I see you broken, dying before me.

I awake to feel our bond fading, feel your magic dimming, leaving an aching void where you used to be.

A pity The-Boy-Who-Lived turned out to be The-Man-Who-Was-Just-A-Tad-Too-Late.

A pity I couldn't see what my life without you would be like.  I would have offered up the information they sought.

I've lost yet another job and I've no money.

I've gone back to my parents, back to my old bedroom with its muggle posters and pictures.  Back to Mother's denial, denial about everything, denial about me, about magic, about you and what you meant to me.  What you did for me.  What you did for the world.

I was the Secret Keeper and you my love are gone.