Title: Following Footprints

Author: Geonn

Email: neil_j_miser@yahoo.com

Pairing: Sam/Janet

Category: Drama, Romance

Rating: R

Series: Part of the Jukebox Series, but also could be a standalone Christmas story.

Disclaimer: Stargate and characters are the property of MGM, Gekko, etc. Mainly you need to know no one with the name of Geonn owns the deed to these people.

Archive: Yes, just let me know where it's gonna be.

Spoilers: Everything. Just assume I'll spoil absolutely everything and we'll be fine. *G*

Summary: Sam prepares to reveal her relationship with Janet to the rest of SG-1.

"Don't the trees look like crucified thieves?" Sam asked.

After a moment with no reply, Sam turned and looked for her lover. "Janet? Where did you go?" The brunette was nowhere to be found.

It had only been a few seconds ago when they'd been walking through the blue-lit forest. The trees were all bare, snow trickling down through their black broken branches and building up on the ground. It was like a postcard, some kind of magical winter wonderland that looks nice but could never really exist in nature. Now, Sam stood alone in the clearing, her song quote going unheard. "Janet?" No reply.

She looked down and spotted the small, perfectly oval footprints of Janet's heavy-duty winter boots. Hugging herself against the cold, she followed the straight trail Janet had left for her. The brunette had apparently walked back to the main trail, denoted by a low railing, and was heading back to the cabin. Sam stared at the footprints, unable to believe Janet had just turned around and headed home without a word. She stepped over the railing and started walking, muttering under her breath about her lover's inconsiderate actions and unbelievable rudeness.

The cabin was set away from the road, over a wide bridge. The small creek that went under the bridge was completely frozen, a thin layer of snow dusting it. Sam was again struck by how beautiful it was here; she could understand why the Colonel practically begged to host every year despite the high cost of snacks and liquor. She stepped onto the porch, stomping the snow from her boots and leaning towards the window to peek inside.

Janet was sitting cross-legged in front of the fireplace, gathering small bits of paper and sorting them into five different stacks. Sam huffed and went inside, unzipping her jacket. "Hey!" she called.

"Hey," Janet replied.

"Where the hell did you go?" Sam asked, sitting on the bench and untying her boots. "What's the big idea, leaving me out there by myself?"

Janet looked up, blinking innocently. The fire was dancing in her eyes, her hair still wet from where it had stuck out from beneath her stocking cap. Her cheeks were rosy red, her lips glistening like she'd just applied lip gloss. 'You're mad at her,' Sam reminded herself. 'You're mad at her.' She sighed and said, "You look great right now."

Janet looked down, this time the deepening blush had nothing to do with the weather. "Thank you," she said meekly.

"Where did you wander off to?" Sam asked, standing and crossing into the living room. "I was scared when you just... disappeared like that."

"Christmas Hearts," Janet said, holding up one of the cardboard cut-outs for Sam's examination. "I thought they'd be a nice addition to dinner this year."

Sam took the card and opened it. Inside, Janet's impeccable handwriting spelled out: "Colonel Jack O'Neill. A sweetheart who knows more than he lets on, a hero and a friend and a wonderful person to have in your corner." Sam raised an eyebrow. "Wow. This is pretty nice. What are these for?"

"At dinner, we dig into a hat and read whichever one we draw."

"Sounds kind of corny."

"Ha, ha," Janet said, snatching the card away from Sam. "My Gran always did it and I loved it."

Sam knelt and kissed Janet's temple, running her hand over her lover's knee. "Then I'll talk the guys into it. How long are you going to be here?"

"Um... about fifteen minutes. Why?"

"I think I'm going to take a quick shower. Get warmed up from the walk."

Janet wrapped a hand around Sam's wrist. "Stay here by the fire. I'll help keep you warm." She moved her hand up Sam's sleeve, stroking her arm beneath the wool. "Mm, you're ice cold!"

"Yeah, I'm freezing. I'm just going to pop in and pop out. I just need to get a little feeling back in the extremities."

Janet smiled. "Want me to join you?"

Sam shook her head, smiling. "The guys will be here any minute, Janet." She leaned in and kissed her on the lips. "We're going to tell them about us this weekend. I don't think having them walk in on us would be the right way to break the news."

Janet rubbed her nose against Sam's, the blonde cupping the back of her lover's head as they embraced. "I have to get started if I want to be dressed when the guys show up."

"No. Make it Naked Christmas."

Sam giggled and kissed Janet's lips. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?"

"I've been a very naughty girl this year, Sammy Claus," Janet said, smiling brightly.

"I'm weak," Sam groaned.

"I'm horny," Janet groaned back.

"Janet..."

"Shh," Janet whispered. She reached up and cupped Sam's face, drawing circles on the blonde's cheeks with her fingertips. "You're so cold, baby," she breathed, bringing her lips down and kissing Sam's jawline. She moved her lips to Sam's earlobe, nipping and sucking and putting her hands on Sam's waist. She slid up and under the heavy sweater Sam was wearing and pressed her palms against her lover's stomach. "How'd you get so cold?"

Sam found Janet's lips again and kissed her hard, pushing her back and down to the floor. She straddled the brunette's hips, fingers trembling as she worked the buttons of her shirt. Janet helped Sam remove the garment, sliding it off her shoulders and kissing the other woman's pale shoulders. "You're so beautiful," Sam panted. "I want to kiss you everywhere. Everywhere."

"You already have," Janet said, whispering the words into Sam's mouth before they kissed again. "But do it again."

They grappled for a few minutes, touching, exploring, Sam trying to take care of Janet's upper body as they tried to work out the complicated dynamics of the buttons on two pairs of Levis. They were very complicated mechanisms. The latch for Janet's bra was in front, between her breasts, and when Sam unsnapped it, the material seemed to collapse in her hands. She threw it aside and buried her face in her lover's chest, gently biting and sucking Janet's erect nipples.

Janet pushed Sam's sweater up, the cold making pink puckers of Sam's nipples. Janet pinched and rolled them, flattening her palms against the cool flesh and feeling it begin to warm at the contact. "You're getting warm here, Sam. Where else do you want me to heat you up?"

Sam pressed her face against the crook of Janet's neck, licking and lapping and speaking around mouthfuls. "My ass. My thighs. Between... my legs."

"Are you hot between your legs, Sam?" Janet breathed, writhing beneath Sam as the brilliant astrophysicist finally figured out how to open a pair of jeans. "I'm so hot between my legs, Sam. You can feel. Feel." She bit her lip and arched against Sam's expert fingers. "You're so good at that. God, Sam, yes, my God, touch me there. I love you, Sam."

"Janet," Sam said, kissing the curve of Janet's breast lovingly. "Love you, too. So much, so much, so much, Janet. Janet." She rose up, hovering on all fours over Janet's body, reaching up to frame her face with both hands. "You."

"What?" Janet whispered.

Sam ran her hands over Janet's face, tracing the features, feeling her eyelashes tickle her palms. She buried her hands in Janet's hair and brought her head up, finding her lips in a kiss. Janet moaned into Sam's mouth, moving one of her own hands down to touch Sam between the legs. "You're not cold there," Janet announced, her lips moving against Sam's lips, her tongue flickering into the blonde's mouth.

"No," Sam confirmed. "I'm even warmer... here." She reached down and guided Janet's hand under her jeans. Janet found her own way around the panties and slipped two fingers inside. "Oh, yeah. I'm... burn-burning up there, Janet."

"I want to taste you," Janet said. "Please."

They broke apart, their clothes tossed aside as if they'd become living things. "The couch," Janet said, shimmying out of her panties. "Get on the couch."

Sam laid down, pushing her jeans down to her knees and laying back as a naked Janet pounced upon her. Janet's warm skin collided with Sam's cold flesh, a cloud of steam forming between them and threatening to expand. "You're... too hot. We're making weather," Sam giggled.

Janet kissed Sam's eyes and lowered herself onto Sam's bare thigh. She squeezed her legs together, clinching Sam's leg in a tight vice and pressing her knee forward so that Sam could feel it. "How is that?" Janet asked. "How is that?"

"Mmm," Sam replied. Janet lowered her head, licking Sam's throat and feeling the vibration of the moan. They rocked together, skin to skin, Janet riding Sam's thigh and spreading her warm juices along the cold flesh. "You're still cold, Sam. So cold."

"Warm me up," Sam pleaded. "I need you, Janet."

"You need me?"

"U-uh-huh..."

Janet curled an arm around Sam's neck, holding the other woman close and kissing her. "Tell me."

"I n-need you, baby. I need you right now. I need you to-to make me come. Please, Janet, I want to come with you." She bit her lip and threw her head back. "Oh, my God. I'm going to. You're going to make me come."

"Me?" Janet asked.

"You, Janet, you, you, you, oh, fuck, oh my God, yes..." She clenched her teeth, her entire body tensing as Janet pressed down against the blonde's willing thigh. Every muscle in Sam's body seemed to be trembling at the same decible, a small earthquake rising through her and into the couch. Janet's own orgasm followed a few seconds later, aided by Sam's exploring fingers and a few well-placed kisses to her breasts.

Finally, reluctantly, they separated and found their discarded clothing. Sam kissed Janet, who slipped her hands back under Sam's sweater and frowned. "You're still ice cold."

"I'm just..." Sam shrugged, smiling like a fool. "I don't know. I guess I'll take that shower anyway." She kissed Janet and added, "That was fun... and unexpected. And fun."

Janet smiled. "I'm glad you enjoyed it." She pulled Sam down for a lingering kiss, running her tongue across Sam's bottom lip before letting her go. "I'll see you in about twenty minutes?"

"Yeah," Sam breathed.

"Going to masturbate in the shower?"

Sam arched an eyebrow. "Probably."

Janet grinned and said, "Use the handle of the loofah." She winked and added, "I did this morning."

Sam groaned and headed for the bathroom. As she walked down the dark hallway, she heard Daniel's voice shout, "NO!"

She jerked, as if she'd been punched, and looked over her shoulder. She could still see her lover sitting on the couch. She appeared to be putting her boots back on. "Janet? Did you say something?"

"Hm? No, dear."

"Is Daniel here?"

"I should hope not!" Janet laughed. "Why?"

Sam shook her head. "No reason." She went into the bathroom, rubbing the back of her neck and looking at her reflection in the mirror. Daniel's voice had seemed so real. So close. It was almost as if--

"Get out of my way! Teal'c, hurry!"

"Janet?" Sam said, her voice a pitch higher than she had intended. "Janet, I need help in here!"

"No shower sex," Janet called back.

"JANET!" Sam cried, her voice full of terror as her knees failed her, as her body tumbled forward and she collapsed to the floor of the bathroom. "Janet! Janet! Janet! Janet! Janet! Janet! Janetjanetjanetjanetjanetjanetjanetjanet..."

***

Daniel Jackson came through the Stargate at a dead run, hitting the ramp a full three feet ahead of where he usually landed. He was halfway down the ramp before Jack appeared at the bottom with a deep frown on his face. "What's going on? You barely gave Harriman time to open the iris before you--"

He shut up as Teal'c stepped through the Stargate, the body of Samantha Carter draped across his muscular arms. He was cradling her to his chest, staring down at her like she was an injured kitten as he moved with careful and precise steps down the ramp. Sam's face and hair were snow white, her uniform glazed in the same manner. Three incredibly tall, white-skinned men followed Teal'c through the Gate and the SFs all brought their weapons up, aiming them at the aliens.

"No, stop! They're friends," Daniel said, glancing at the lanky men. "At least I hope they are."

Teal'c dropped to one knee, lowering Sam's body to the gurney the medical team had provided. Jack jerked away when he realized her eyes were still wide open, staring up at the world but unseeing. A male doctor knelt next to the body and began checking for vital signs. Jack grabbed the man by the back of his lab jacket and pulled him away. "No, I don't want some trainee working on her. Get Fraiser down here now!"

The doctor glanced at Daniel, then said, "General O'Neill, I don't..."

"Fraiser!" Jack snapped.

"JACK," Daniel said, grabbing a handful of Jack's coat. "Dr. Carmichael can't get Janet."

"Why the fu--" Jack froze, his entire body going rigid as he looked at Carmichael. Realization dawned on him like a slap in the face. He released the man's lab jacket, turning his face away. "Go," he said softly. "Get her to the infirmary. Go."

The orderlies lifted the gurney, carrying Sam away from the ramp and out of the room. Jack backed up to let them get by, moving a hand to his forehead and taking a deep breath. He took another. He took another. Then he walked swiftly to the blast door and punched it as hard as he could. When the resounding boom had subsided, he turned and glared at Daniel and Teal'c. "Fifteen minutes. Briefing." He held his hand against his stomach and left the room.

---

Sam was carefully laid out on a bed in the infirmary, her arms eased down to her sides, her face covered by a respiration mask. It almost pained Daniel to see how low her vital signs were. The three tall, silent aliens stood to one side, clustered together and staring at the woman laying on the bed. Jack entered the infirmary, glaring at the aliens before he looked at Sam. "What happened?" he said softly, obviously trying to keep himself under control.

"The people of M32-585 call themselves Leire." He pronounced it 'Le-eyre,' the aliens looking towards him at the mention of their name. "When we arrived, we found that they were in the middle of some sort of blizzard. We spoke for a while and determined that the blizzard had started roughly four hundred years ago. Nonstop snow. The building we were currently in had been buried before any of these three were born."

"Daniel, I know almost all of that from the MALP. Why don't you cut to the part where Colonel Carter is laying there practically dead?"

"Jack, I can't just tell you what happened. You have to understand why this happened."

The General stepped forward, getting in Daniel's face. "Cut. To the chase, Dr. Jackson."

Daniel closed his eyes. "Fine. One of the aliens injected Sam with something and now they're saying that she's probably going to die."

"That's all I needed to know." He stepped back and motioned to the door, drawing three armed airmen into the room. "Take those three men into custody. Keep them separated."

"Jack, no," Daniel said. "They'll die if they stay here longer than--"

"Oh, no," Jack said, raising his eyebrows. "They'll die? After they came to our planet of their own free will? What a pity."

"General O'Neill," Teal'c said. "You must hear the entire story before you condemn the Leire to death."

Jack looked at Sam, then closed his eyes. "Fine. Explain away."

Daniel took a deep breath, knowing he might not get another chance. "The Leire were open to negotiations with our world. They kept their buildings unbelievably cold and Sam mentioned it to one of them during a break. She asked how they were able to handle such low temperatures year-round. One of the leaders," he motioned at one of the men being held by the airman, "said that they had developed a special enzyme which allowed their bodies to acclimate to the below-freezing weather. Sam said she would like to get a closer look at the enzyme, which is when... one of the men withdrew a syringe and injected her with something. It happened too fast for anyone to react and it took effect almost immediately."

"Is there a cure? An antidote?"

"They've never needed one," Daniel said softly.

"Okay. Which one of these guys injected her?" Jack asked.

"I won't say."

"Then they'll all suffer for it."

"Jack..."

"End of discussion," Jack said. He turned to the airmen and said, "The brig. Now. That's an order."

***

Sam sat on the couch, curled next to Janet and letting the doctor tilt the coffee cup against her mouth. She took another sip of the hot cocoa and said, "Mm," to let Janet know to pull the mug back. Janet put the cup on the coffee table, leaning back against Sam and stroking her hair. "Are you feeling a little better?" Janet asked gently.

"Yeah," Sam said, laying her head on Janet's shoulder. She had her knees drawn up against her chest, wrapped in a huge blanket from Jack's bed. Janet was a comforting weight and heat against her side. She held Janet's hand under the comforter, blinking at the fire. "I feel so stupid."

"Hey, don't say that," Janet admonished. "You just had a little scare."

"I thought... I was going to die. I thought I could feel my heart stopping. God, Janet," she began sobbing again and Janet held her tight, letting her cry. She occasionally made shushing noises, her hand sliding up and down Sam's back as she rocked her. "I don't like being scared."

"You know I'm always going to be here for you."

"You can't promise that," Sam said, sniffling and putting her face against Janet's sweater. It smelled like Janet, like her perfume and her skin and her sweat and her shampoo. She wanted to wrap the sweater around her head and fall asleep. "You could leave."

"Leave you?" Janet said. "No."

"You could die," Sam argued.

Janet didn't say a word. She just kissed the top of Sam's head.

"Janet," Sam asked softly. "Janet, did you--"

"Shhh," Janet interrupted. "Just rest. You hit your head."

Sam blinked, raising up and looking at her lover. "Janet."

"What is it, honey?"

Sam was trembling again. "You died."

"Yes, so?" Janet said, frowning as if Sam had just asked if she had gone to the store.

Sam looked at the door, then looked down at herself. "We're not waiting for Colonel and the others, are we?"

"No."

"So... w-what are we waiting for?"

"We're waiting for them to say it's time to leave here."

Sam looked down at Janet's hands, where the fingers were intertwined with her own. "Them? Leave?"

Janet kissed Sam's knuckles, then softly said, "You're dying, sweetheart."

"No," Sam mouthed, not finding the courage to actually voice the denial.

CHAPTER TWO - Monday Morning Church

Daniel and Teal'c met up with Jack in the briefing room twenty minutes later. As soon as he entered the room, Daniel launched into his argument. "Jack, you cannot keep these people here for a prolonged period. Their bodies are wired differently, they're used to different temperatures. They won't survive long here."

"Darn," Jack said, moving towards the door to his office.

Teal'c stepped in front of him, blocking him from going through the door. "You must hear our argument, General O'Neill."

Jack sighed and looked at Teal'c, then turned to face Daniel. "You're sticking up for the guys who did this to Carter?"

"Yeah," Daniel said. "That alone should tell you something."

"Yeah, it does. It tells me that I shouldn't have left the team." He sighed and said, "Teal'c, please move."

"I cannot follow that order, O'Neill."

Jack nodded, then said, "I get it. Carter wasn't the only one injected. You were both stabbed and got a healthy dose of stupid juice. Makes sense now." He looked into Teal'c's face and said, "Move. Or I will have an airman escort you out of my door and take you all the way to the brig."

"You would lock up Teal'c?" Daniel said.

"Don't want to," he said. He closed his eyes and visibly looked ill. He opened his eyes and shook his head. "Don't make me do it, buddy."

Teal'c reluctantly took a step to one side, letting Jack pass. Daniel followed him into the office, holding the door open long enough to get inside. "Jack, I'm not going to let this go."

"Then drop it. Move on. Get over it. Take your pick of the phrasing, just as long as we stop talking about it."

Daniel leaned forward, looking into Jack's face. "Why did you call for Janet?"

Jack looked like he had been slapped. He brought his hand to his face, rubbing his chin and then turning his chair to look at the wall. "Daniel, please. End it. Right now."

"I can't, Jack. You assigned Dr. Carmichael yourself. Why did you ask for Janet?"

Jack chewed his lip and stood up again. "I'm going to talk to these Leire people." He pushed past Daniel and out of the office.

***

"I'm dead?" Sam asked, standing against the wall now.

"No," Janet said, from her position on the couch. "But you are dying. You have to trust me, Sam."

Sam began to pace, her hands still shaking from the cold. "This is unbelievable. How... I mean, when did..." She looked out the window. "It's two days before Christmas. We're at Colonel O'Neill's cabin waiting for the rest of SG-1 to arrive with Cassandra. This is REAL. I know it is, it feels too real to be... anything else."

"It's Christmas, 2002," Janet said. "It's 2004."

"What?" Sam asked. "No, how could I lose two years?"

"You didn't," Janet said. She rubbed the back of her neck and stood up. "Sam, you are now a Colonel and the leader of SG-1. Jack is a General and he's in charge of the SGC. And I died a year ago."

Sam snapped, "Stop saying that! Janet didn't die."

"I am Janet."

"No. This is some kind of plot. How long before you start asking i-if I... if I will tell you the iris code? God, how much have I already let slip? Holy Hannah, I just fucked you!"

Janet closed her eyes. "I hate it when you say we're just fucking. It makes it sound so cheap. Like I don't matter."

"It doesn't mean that," Sam said, closing her eyes. "It's just a phrase."

"Then call it what it is. Say we're making love."

"I don't see why--" She stopped, putting her hands to her ears and shaking her head. "Don't do that again."

Janet pressed her lips together. "You have a sweet spot at the top of your thighs. When I lick you there, you purr. I love it when you purr and I lick you on that sweet spot every chance I get."

"You're getting that out of my head."

"Okay, then. I always hated the way you nuzzled the back of my neck."

Sam frowned. "What?"

"It felt... weird. It only gave me goosebumps because it was so strange."

Sam shook her head. "Now I know you're lying. Janet loved that. I did it to her every night before we went to bed."

"I let you do it because I knew you loved to smell my hair. Just like when you would let me suck on your toes. I know feet gross you out, but... you knew my fetish."

"Stop it," Sam said.

"You're starting to believe me."

"No."

"Then why are you crying?"

"Because if all of this is true, then all of this is true."

Janet frowned.

"I'll die if all of this is true. I'll send the doctor, whoever is working on me, I'll tell them to stop. To let me go. Because if all of this is true and you're really dead, I'll go away with you."

Janet closed her eyes and touched Sam's face. "It's not up to you."

"You said I was dying. You said that we were just--"

"I know. And you are dying." She nodded towards the window and Sam looked out. Instead of the snow-covered landscape, she saw herself laying in an infirmary bed. Her skin was deathly pale, her hair fanning out on the pillow beneath her head, her mouth covered by an oxygen mask. The heartrate monitor next to the bed was beeping with excrutiating slowness. A male doctor with sandy blonde hair was checking her chart. "That's Dr. Carmichael. We're waiting to see if he or the team can come up with something to save you."

"What is this place?" Sam asked.

"There aren't names for this kind of place," Janet said.

She turned around and said, "How long are we supposed to wait? I mean... th-there has to be a point where they'll give up." A tear rolled down her cheek and she said, "How long until I know if I'm going to stay with you?"

"I don't know," Janet said softly. "I died instantly. I didn't come to a place like this. When you were hurt... they let me know almost immediately and I..." She shrugged and looked around. "I guess I built this place."

"You built it?" Sam asked, looking at the cabin. "How? And who are 'they'?"

"And that's all I know."

Sam frowned. "What?"

"What?"

"You just said 'and that's all I know.'"

"No," Janet said, shaking her head. Sam blinked and Janet was sitting on the couch. "That's everything."

Sam looked around, then said, "You're telling me where we are, aren't you? You're explaining everything you know."

"Yes, that's right," Janet said. "Do you not understand? Do you not see how wonderful this all--"

Sam held up her hands. "Janet, I don't... remember... anything... of what you just said."

Janet blinked. "They never said I couldn't explain it. I guess... they can just make sure you don't remember what I say."

"Oh, God," Sam said, covering her mouth. "If I live, will I forget all of this?"

"I honestly don't know," Janet admitted.

"Then I'm going to take this opportunity." She dropped to her knees and took Janet's hand. "I love you more than life. I would trade going back for eternity here, wherever this place is, with you. If we walk out that door and find Hell, I could survive knowing I had chosen you. You opened my heart wider than I ever thought possible and I thank you for being mine and spending part of your life with me and, God, it was so short, but I will cherish every single second that I had." She reached up and stroked a stray hair out of Janet's eyelash. "And even if I forget what has happened here, know that I will keep these promises because I've held you in my heart every day since we met, Janet, and it will be impossible for me to ever forget you."

Janet was crying by the time Sam finished, laying her head in the brunette's lap and wrapping her arms around her. "I love you, Janet. I wanted to marry you, to be your wife, to live until the end of time letting people know that I belonged to you. I love your soul and I love your spirit."

"Is that a... a proposal?" Janet asked.

"No," Sam shook her head. "That would imply that we weren't already married."

Janet arched an eyebrow.

"By this time in the real timeline, Colonel O'Neill and the others had already arrived. So we might as well play with reality a little."

Janet looked down and saw the diamond ring on her left hand. "I didn't know you could do that."

"Do you want to find out what else we can do?"

Janet smiled.

***

Jack joined his fingers behind his neck and tilted his head back until he heard a pop. He sighed and relaxed, walking forward between the two banks of cells. He felt like an old-time sheriff ready to confront the town drunk. He pivoted on his heel, glaring through the bars of the cell at the alien. His skin was so pale, jagged blue veins were visible across his cheeks and neck. He held his long-fingered hands in front of himself as if in prayer, opening his pale eyes when he heard Jack. "You are the world leader."

"I'm the leader of this facility," Jack said, still finding it odd to say that. "And it's as much of the world as you and your buddies are ever gonna see."

"We meant no harm for your friend. Did Daniel not tell you this much?"

"He told me what happened."

The Leire stood. "Then we are free to go?"

"Sit your ass back down," Jack said. "No, you're not free to go. You're not getting out of here until you tell us how to save our friend."

"Please, it is so hot."

"Yeah, I had them crank up the heat in here."

"Why would you do such a thing?" the Leire asked. "Did Daniel not say that--"

Jack interrupted, "He told me. I decided not to care very much."

The Leire's eyes widened and he grabbed the bars of his cell. "Please. Leader. You must not do this."

"Think of a way we might be able to help Carter. Then we'll see about lowering the temperature in here." He turned and walked from the room, leaving the alien alone in his ninety degree cell.

---

"We've contacted the Tok'ra," Daniel said. "At least... we think we have." He sighed and shook his head. "The truth is, we're not sure the message even went through. We're not on their list of favorite people after--"

"Right," Jack interrupted. "Teal'c?"

"SG-16 reported cryogenic technology existing on P44-89C. However, when they asked for assistance in this matter, the ruling council of the world refused--"

Jack waved his hand. "I got enough." He leaned forward and steepled his hands. "How is Carter's progress?"

"Not good," Carmichael said, immediately falling silent.

Jack held his hands out. "That's all? 'Not good' is your medical opinion?"

Carmichael glanced across the briefing room table at Teal'c. "I... just didn't want to get shushed."

"What is Carter's condition, Doctor?" Jack asked, leaning back in his chair and rubbing his eyes.

"She's getting worse. And she's getting colder. Her body temperature is dropping with every passing hour. At this rate, her core body temperature will cross the point of no return within three hours. As it is, she's only being kept alive by machines."

"No extraordinary means," Daniel muttered.

"I know, Daniel," Jack said.

"Colonel Carter has a living will?" Carmichael asked.

"It's not applicable," Jack said, pushing away from the table.

Daniel stood as well. "Jack, you're not thinking straight. You're the general of this facility and you have a responsibility..."

Jack grabbed the lapels of Daniel's jacket, pushing the younger man against the table and getting in his face. "I am not going to lose Carter on my watch. Do you hear me, Doctor Jackson? I am the General. I am now responsible for her. And I will not lose her this early. Do you understand?"

"Yeah," Daniel said softly.

Jack released him and turned around, going back into his office and slamming the door. Daniel stood up and hesitated, gathering his files. After a moment, he slid the files across the table and stormed across the room. He slammed into Jack's office without knocking and put his hands in the center of Jack's desk, leaning into the other man's face. "Do you think you're the only one who wants Sam to live? Do you think Teal'c and I have given up? We were on that world and we know what the Leire may have to offer. If you would just hear us out long enough to get a fact into your brain, maybe you'd understand where we're coming from."

There was a moment between the men. Their relationship would either crash and burn or continue on a little stronger. Finally, Jack looked at the door and saw Teal'c standing right outside. "All right. What?"

"The ruling council of the Leire people have been trying for years to develop a weapon. They share a planet with enemies just like we do here. One weapon is so highly controversial that they don't even like to admit it exists. It's an enzyme that heightens a body's core temperature to highly dangerous levels. The highest temperature they've ever recorded is 92.9."

"If I may," Dr. Carmichael interjected. "If Colonel Carter's body temperature were to rise that high, or even to the moderately high eighties, there's a chance her body would take over and go the rest of the way."

Jack nodded and said, "You think they'll hand over this weapon?"

"As much as I hate to say it," Daniel said, "We're holding three of their political leaders prisoner in a room nearing ninety degrees. I'm pretty sure they'd be open to what we ask."

***

She lay in the center of the bed, staring at the ceiling. Her toes curling and relaxing, every muscle tense and straining. Sweat poured down her face, over her naked breasts, mingling with the other wetness in her dark pubic hair. Her fingers gripped and released the sheets, pulling at the bedclothes as she writhed and thrashed and breathed her lover's name. It came out garbeled, like an ancient forgotten language. "I'm coming," she said. "I'm going to come with you. I'm coming, too."

Whimpering quietly in harmony with herself, she felt herself contract and cried out, moving a hand between her legs and touching herself. When the orgasm crested, when both of them had been sated, Janet opened her eyes and realized Sam was curled in a ball next to her. "There are no words for that," Sam breathed. "I was... I mean, we were really..."

"You were me," Janet said.

Sam frowned. "I thought that... that you were... Who were we just now?"

Janet thought, then said, "We were SaJanetha Caraiseter."

Sam smiled broadly. "If I die, can we do that... wherever we're going?"

"I don't want to talk about you dying," Janet said, her smile immediately vanishing.

"Okay. But... what we just did... that's not, you know, f-frowned upon where we are?"

"Do you love me?"

"Of course," Sam said without hesitation.

"It may surprise you to know that the most important organ, when it comes to true love, is the heart rather than the penis."

Sam smiled, and pressed her face against Janet's. "That sounds like something you would've said before..."

"It's what I've always believed," Janet said. She brought her hand up and stroked Sam's bare shoulder. "Wrong kind of love. What the hell kind of oxymoron is that?"

Sam kissed Janet hard, their lips slipping together. Sam pulled back, touching her mouth and looking at Janet's chin. "Can we... make love without... you know... blending?"

Janet smiled. "We can give it a shot."

***

The Leire stalked down the ramp and, at his full height, rising a full two feet over Jack's head. He stopped at the base of the ramp and looked down at Jack. "You are General O'Neill of the SGC, of the Tau'ri, the humans."

"Let me guess. You're the Kinsey of this world."

"I do not know what a 'kenzey' is, however you are keeping this facility far too temperate for the tastes of my people. You must lower the temperature drastically or our negotiations will end."

Jack shrugged. "All right." He turned and said, "All right, Sergeant, dial it up again."

"What?" the Leire said.

"Thermostat stays put, buddy," Jack said as the Stargate began to dial. He winked. "Consider it incentive to get this negotiating over with fast."

The Leire sneered. "Why would I bow to your terms? It is your world that is requesting our assistance."

"True. But three of your people have been on this base, in this temperature, for a couple of hours. Think about that." He winked and added, "Give us a call when you're ready to get your pals back." He turned and walked towards the blast doors.

As the Stargate opened, the Leire stepped forward. "Perhaps there is something our government can do to assist you."

Jack smiled and turned around. "Cooperation. That's what I like to see."

***

"Sam," Janet said softly, brushing Sam's hair out of her face. "Samantha, wake up, honey."

Sam rolled her head, the light coming in through the bedroom window cascading over the bed and hitting her in the face. She held up a hand to block the sunlight, blinking the sleep from her eyes and smiling at Janet. "Hey, sweetheart," she groaned. "Good morning."

"Good morning, my love," Janet said.

Sitting up, Sam frowned and kissed Janet's cheek. "Why are you crying?"

"Sam..."

"Why is... God, Janet, why is it sunny?"

Janet broke down, grabbing Sam and holding tight to her. "I will treasure these few hours that we had here, Sam. Know that and remember that."

"Remember... Janet, what is going on?" Sam asked, clinging to her lover. "Why am I... Janet, did I die?"

"No."

"I'm going back," Sam whispered, pulling back and looking into Janet's eyes. She brushed her thumbs over the other woman's cheeks and broke down herself. "No, I don't want to. I want to stay here. I want to go with you."

"You can't."

"I'm giving up." She looked at the ceiling and cried out, "I GIVE UP! Do you hear me?! I'm giving up!"

Janet put two fingers over Sam's lips. "We don't have much time. Sam, what you said last night will live in my heart until we see each other again. It'll get me through the hell of being away from you."

"What will I have, Janet? What will I have to remember this? Do you know how much it kills me every day when I wake up and remember what happened to you? Do you know what it takes for me to go on with my life without you in my life? You're... God, it's like there's this hole in everything and I don't know how I'm going to fill it or if I even can. I gave you so much of myself and then you left and took it and you left me empty." She hit Janet on the shoulder, tears streaming down her face. "How could you leave me? How? How could you do that? Didn't you know how much it would kill me? You're all that mattered and you're gone and I don't want to live--"

Janet grabbed Sam and held her tight. Sam began to weep, her fingers pressing tight into Janet's shoulders. "Go into me. Go inside of me, Janet, please, I'll take you back, please, just go inside of me. Leave me here, use my body. You're more important. Go, please, Janet, go."

"Sam..."

"NO!"

Janet pulled back and put her hand over Sam's left breast. Her fingers spread, glowing and a warmth began to spread through Sam's entire chest. Sam gasped and managed to say "What are you d--" before she saw

sam and janet at the beach and sam and janet kissing for the first time ever and sam and janet spending the night under the stars and sam and janet laughing at each other and sam and janet fighting and seeing janet mad and seeing janet sad and seeing janet overjoyed and seeing janet frustrated because of cassandra, oh, what had she done now and kissing the soft skin behind janet's knee because that makes janet purr and licking janet's earlobe and kissing janet everywhere and loving janet and loving janet and loving her and nothing else just love janet and spending all that precious time with janet and ignoring janet because they were mad at each other and making up and watching janet undress and getting a lap dance and pushing janet against the wall and all the mistakes and all the joys and all the wonders and everything everything everything they had had before it had been taken away and they would have it again, it was certain it was promised it was certain and it was called heaven

Sam woke up slowly, her eyelashes sticking together and making it difficult to open her eyes. "She's coming to," a man said.

She felt a hand on her forearm, gently squeezing before a familiar voice said, "Sam? Are you awake?"

"She's gone," Sam said, a fresh round of tears starting.

Daniel looked over the bed at Dr. Carmichael. "W-who, Sam? Who is gone?"

Sam blinked at Daniel. "What?"

"You said 'she's gone,'" he reminded her. "Who is gone?"

Sam closed her eyes, shaking her head slowly. "I-I don't know. I must have been... I don't know."

"Do you know why you're crying?" Daniel asked.

Touching her eyes and finding them wet, she accepted it when Carmichael explained, "I don't think she's actually crying. That's probably just the excess moisture from the thawing process."

"Thawing?" Sam asked. Her memory began to slowly fill in the pieces. "The Leire... injected me."

"Yeah," Daniel said. "Jack managed to convince their government to hand over something their army had been developing. It was fatal to them and their enemies, but it managed to bring your body temperature high enough that nature took over."

"I'm out of the woods?"

"Not entirely," Dr. Carmichael said. "We'll have to monitor you for a few days and keep track of your body temperature. But for the most part, you're out of immediate danger."

"It's weird," Sam said, resting her head on the pillow.

"What?"

She shook her head. "It's nothing. It's just... well, for some reason, a part of me feels like that's bad news."

EPILOGUE - CHRISTMAS EVE, Several Months Later.

Sam picked up the Christmas ornament, turning it over in her hand a few times before dangling it from a bare limb. Behind her, General O'Neill was sorting through a box of Christmas lights, trying to get them untangled as he regaled General Hammond with yet another story of life at the base. The former commanding officer of the SGC laughed and nodding and tried not to say "I told you so" too many times. Cassandra found another ornament and handed it to Sam. "This would look good right there," she said, pointing to a bare branch next to Sam's right hand.

"You know, you could do this professionally, kid."

Cassandra beamed, going back into the box. Sam glanced out the window, where Teal'c and Daniel were standing on the porch. Without looking up, Cassie asked, "Do you want to have a snowball fight later?"

Sam shuddered involuntarily. "No, I think I'm going to stay inside this year." She had completely recovered from her ordeal on the Leire homeworld, but she still got chills surprisingly easy. She didn't like cold rooms and she generally wore sweaters and wool socks whenever she was at home. Even summertime was a little too chilly for her at the moment. Dr. Carmichael assured her the effects were temporary, and she had to admit that she wasn't quite as cold as she had expected to be... but an hour or so flinging snow at her friends didn't strike her as fun.

"Okay," Cassie said.

She didn't know about Sam's ordeal or her ongoing struggle with being too cold. Sam reached down and tousled the girl's hair, then said, "I'm going to go talk to General O'Neill for a minute, all right?"

"Sure."

Sam walked across the room, interrupting Jack and smiling at Hammond. "Sorry, Sir. Mind if I steal the General for a second?"

"Which of us are you talkin' to there, Carter?" Jack asked.

Sam smiled. "General Hammond, may I have a moment alone with General O'Neill?"

"Sure, Colonel," he said. "We'll continue this after dinner, Jack."

Jack waited until Hammond was at the Christmas tree with Cassandra before he turned to Sam. "What's up?"

"I've been thinking about what happened a few months ago, Sir. With the Leire."

Jack frowned. "Oh. Yeah, what about that?"

Sam glanced at Hammond. "When I was feeling better, Daniel told me about what had happened in the Gate Room. He told me you asked for Janet. Did you honestly forget... that s-she was..."

"Yeah, Carter, for a minute." He looked away. "I have to consciously remind myself sometimes that she's really... gone."

"I don't think she is, Sir."

Jack looked up, eyes wide and searching Sam's face to see if she was making some kind of sick joke. Finally, he said, "What do you mean? Do you think the Goa'uld grabbed her? Maybe used a sarcophagus or--"

"No, Sir," Sam said, stopping him before he could get riled up further. "When I was dying, I was... somewhere else. I can only remember bits and pieces of it, like a dream. But I know that it wasn't a dream. I didn't make it up and... Janet was there."

"Like what? A ghost?"

"No." She brought a hand up to her forehead and said, "If I could explain this clearly, I wouldn't have waited so long to say something. I was dying. I was somewhere else. And Janet was there with me. I don't know exactly what happened there or what she said, but Janet still... exists."

Jack chewed his bottom lip for a minute, then started to nod slowly. "I believe it."

"Really?" Sam said. "I was so sure you wouldn't."

"Of all the things we've seen and been through? Life after death is the most believable thing I've heard in years." He smirked and said, "C'mon. Let's get some of those snowman cookies before Daniel and Teal'c scarf 'em all down."

---

The lights were all turned down low. Jack was sitting in his favorite armchair, fast asleep with the bowl of popcorn on his lap. Cassie was laying on the floor in front of the couch, her thumb pressed against her bottom lip. Daniel and Teal'c had fallen asleep on the couch, together, leaning against one another. Jack had seven Polaroids to prove it, all of which were now hanging from the mantle. General Hammond had bid them farewell a few hours earlier. Sam stood by the window, the only person of the group that was still awake.

She held a mug of hot cocoa, staring out at the fresh snow that was falling. Night was brighter out here, in the dead of winter. The sky was deep gray, the air the color of ice. It looked, she decided, much like a postcard. She was about to turn away from the window, find a spot and curl up for the night, when she saw something peculiar just beyond the porch. Footprints.

Daniel and Teal'c had come inside hours ago. Their footprints had all been filled in by new snow. And there was only one set of footprints, leading directly into the woods. She stepped away from the window, taking Jack's heavy winter coat from the hook and sliding into it. She covered it with her own heavy-duty jacket and zipped it up. She found a sweater and some gloves in the closet, pulling them on and putting on a hat with earflaps. Finally, she laced up Teal'c's boots tightly and ventured out into the snow.

Weaving between the trees, hugging herself tightly, she followed the trail of footprints that didn't seem to fade with the falling snow. The edges of the imprints remained crisp and clean, making Sam frown as she stepped around them to keep from destroying such perfectly-created depressions. She made a final turn... and gasped.

The snow was gone, replaced by brown and green and yellow leaves. Janet was sitting on a slope, resting her arms on her knees and staring into the distance. She was dressed for cold weather, with gloves and a blue scarf. But Sam knew immediately what this valley was. She'd had countless nightmares about this world. "I don't want to be here," she said.

Janet turned and looked at Sam. "Hi," she said.

Sam looked back, seeing the snow-covered trail behind her. "I don't want to be here," she repeated. "Anywhere else. Please, Janet, just... not here."

Janet stood up and walked over to Sam. "You have to let it go sometime, Sam."

"No, I don't."

"Have I ever been wrong?"

Sam closed her eyes, smiling. "So I don't get to win? Not even now?"

"Not even now," Janet said.

Sam brushed her nose against Janet's, what her mother had called an eskimo kiss. Sam took Janet's hands in her own, holding them tightly. "I don't want to leave, either."

"You have to make up your mind, Sam."

Sam looked into the distance and saw an active Stargate standing high on a hill. "What if I choose to hold your hand and run into that Stargate?"

"Jack and Teal'c go looking for you tomorrow and find you in the woods, dead from exposure."

"I don't want to die."

"I understand that. I'd hate to see you make that decision. Don't worry, Sam... we'll see each other soon enough," Janet said. "I promise."

Sam kissed Janet softly and said, "I won't see you again, will I?"

"Not until it's time to go home," Janet said, tears in her eyes.

"You're so beautiful when you cry," Sam said softly, stroking her lover's cheek. "It... I just want to hug you until you're all better." Janet laughed, knocking loose a few tears. "Don't cry," Sam said, pulling Janet close and hugging her tight.

"Don't go nuts, don't go crazy with the Danger Girl stuff," Janet warned. "Even if it takes a hundred years before you die, it'll feel like a heartbeat compared to the time we'll have together."

"How long is eternity?" Sam asked.

"Not long enough," Janet said. She stepped back and took Sam's hand, placing something in it. She curled Sam's fingers around the item and said, "Don't open your hand until you're back at the cabin. Merry Christmas, Sam. I love you."

"I love you, too, Janet."

Janet turned and walked away, the autumnal world disappearing as she slowly began to fade. Sam watched her go, teardrops freezing to her face and finally turning around and walking back to the cabin. She stood on the porch in the predawn, staring at her closed hand. Had Janet really made this fist? Had their fingers really touched? Sam uncurled her hand and looked at the gift.

At first, she thought there was nothing there, just a tiny speck of snow that had gotten caught in her glove. Then, it flickered. The spark began to brighten until it was like a flashbulb in her hand, spinning and getting brighter with every revolution. She couldn't take her eyes off of it, couldn't blink, couldn't consider looking away from this miniature sun. It grew, covering her entire hand, until she couldn't see her fingers. Suddenly, it split apart and seemed to thrust itself towards her face. She didn't even think to flinch, not pulling away as it impacted her face.

There was no pain. Just warmth. The warmth of a kiss, of an embrace, and the memory of an eskimo kiss. Sam smiled, closing her eyes and stepping into the cabin.

Jack was awake, standing just outside of the living room and holding two cups of cocoa. "Hey," he said, handing one mug out to her.

She took it, feeling the warmth against her palms and pulling it close so the steam wrapped around her face. "General. I..."

He shook his head, taking a sip of his own mug. "Don't, Carter. Just take it for what it was." She frowned and looked down at her cocoa. He'd used three marshmallows, just like Janet had always done. When she looked up, she saw that there were tears in Jack's eyes. He smiled and said one simple word. "Charlie."

Sam nodded, taking a sip of her cocoa and watching as O'Neill returned to the living room. She carried her mug to the window, looking out on the winter scene. Only one set of footprints led into the woods - her own. She sighed and put her mug down. "Merry Christmas, Janet," she said. She put her hand against the window, watching as the fogged around her hand. It had been months since she'd been warm enough to do that. She smiled, realizing she wasn't nearly as cold as she had been earlier in the night. "Thank you," she whispered.

She turned and walked back into the living room, taking a seat next to Teal'c and closing her eyes.

THE END