After Images

Fandom: The Practice

Series: Photomosaic

Title: After Images

Author: Carla

Rating: R-lite

Pairing: LH/RK

Disclaimers: The usual. I own nothing. I am not David E. Kelley or any of the myriad of suits who own The Practice. I am however grateful to play in their sandbox. NO profit made but lots of fun was had.

Archiving: okay to list archives and the Realm. All my stuff can be found at http:/www.realmoftheshadow.com/carla.htm

Author's Note: Another outtake from S&SF presented for your reading pleasure. Or not. At any rate here it is let me know what you think. Feedback of any size and shape can be sent to me at cmfloresfd@yahoo.com

Also this isn't beta-ed so any and all mistakes are mine and mine alone.

Roberta gave herself a once over in the full-length mirror. She liked what she saw. At fifty-five she worked diligently at keeping her body in the best possible condition. An hour each morning either exercising or doing yoga and two miles each evening on the treadmill in her bedroom paid off in spades she thought. "You look damn good Roberta," she said to her reflection. Sure not everything was as firm as it used to be but certainly none of the men she'd been with since Charles had complained. And Lucy in the car that afternoon, Roberta didn't think she would
complain either.

The linen dress she wore was simple elegant the slight vee at the neck hinting at what lay beneath. The doorbell rang and she hurriedly checked her lipstick once more before rushing to answer it.

"Hi. Come in come in. I'm almost ready just let me get my shoes and a jacket."

"Oh there's no rush I'm a little early," Jimmy stepped inside. From behind his back he brought forth a bouquet of carnations. He had the sense that perhaps their relationship was fading for her and he wanted to impress her. He had noticed that lately there was always an arrangement of carnations in her chambers and figured they must be her favorites. "These are for you," he bowed slightly at the waist as he passed the bouquet to her.

"Jimmy how sweet. Let me get a vase." She took the bouquet from him and went into the kitchen. She looked over her shoulder to see if Jimmy had followed her into the kitchen. He had. "How'd you know I like carnations?"

"I noticed them in your chambers."

She was facing away from him and so he didn't see her smile and her flush. Lucy sent a bouquet once a week, her cousin Joanne worked at a florist not far from the courthouse. Every week since Sheila had been born almost six months ago. How like Jimmy not to notice until now. She finished arranging the flowers in a vase and set it on the countertop. She dried her hands on a dishcloth and turned to face him again. "Well they're my favorite." She crossed the kitchen and gave him a quick peck on the cheek, "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He tried to kiss her on the mouth but she quickly moved away. Her lips still vibrated with the memory of Lucy' kiss only hours before and there was no way she was going to erase that all to pleasant experience with Jimmy and his gruffness. Or with anyone else for that matter, she thought.

"Roberta?"

"Yes."

"There's....never mind. We should get going." He looked away from her, he wanted to ask if there was someone else but at the same time he didn't want to know. He'd rather live with the illusion a little longer, at least through dinner with his mother.

It was over desert that the idea came to him. Roberta was talking about a movie she'd seen that afternoon and everything clicked into place. Her increasing distance these last months, her standing dates which rarely, if ever, she broke. First it had been Thursdays after her writing class, then Saturday afternoon and finally, now that he thought about it, Mondays too. The only person, other than Judge Hiller, he knew she spent anytime with outside of work was Lucy. He'd seen them at a Red Sox game once. And now here she was telling his mother and her partner about the movie she'd seen that afternoon, the lesbian movie she'd seen. And this was Roberta, a woman he'd represented in a sexual harassment case involving a man half her age. That she would perhaps be attracted to and act on her attraction to someone who was much younger was not inconceivable. The problem was that he really couldn't 'see' her with another woman; to the best of his knowledge her appetites had always been heterosexual in nature. But then there'd been a time when he hadn't been able to picture his mother partnered with another woman either.

"Jimmy?" Roberta nudged him under the table his mother was talking to him. "Jimmy dear are you all right?"

"Hmm. What oh....no I'm fine Ma. Just remembered something for work is all."

"Do you need to go?"

"No Ma not at all. Tonight's all about you."

"We were just telling Roberta about this lovely bed and breakfast we found in New Hampshire last weekend."

"I didn't know you'd gone on a trip even."

"It was our anniversary last weekend."

"That's right. I forgot. I'm sorry Ma."

"You have your own life I know. Anyway you should take Roberta a woman likes being whisked away every now and then Jimmy."

Next to him Roberta squirmed uncomfortably in her chair, "Well you know how it is we're both so busy it can be hard to get away. Did I tell you I have a granddaughter now, Sheila Louise. Would you like to see her picture?" Like all proud grandparents she carried a picture of her grandchild with her and which she now showed the two women seated across the table.

"Oh she's beautiful Roberta you must be so excited your first grandchild?"

"Yes," she glanced at Jimmy, who mouthed 'Thank you', and winked.

"Do you get to see her much?"

"No my son and his wife live in Springfield but you know it's amazing what you can do with computers and stuff these days. The last time he was here Hugh set up one of those Webcam things on my computer now we talk a couple of times a week online and I get to see the baby."

"Oh how nice."

The evening ended soon after and Jimmy drove Roberta home.

"Can I come in?"

"I don't think so Jimmy."

"I just want to talk."

"What's there to talk about?"

"You. Me. Us."

"There is no us Jimmy. Not really maybe once but not now."

"I care about you Roberta a lot," there was an earnestness to his voice that touched and saddened her.

"And I care about you but I'm not in love with you. And if you're really honest with yourself you'll see you're not in love with me either."

"There's someone else isn't there?"

In the dark of the car she looked down at her hands in her lap. Was there someone else? She didn't know really, she couldn't answer that one. Did she want there to be? Oh yes. The throughout the evening her mind had wandered to Lucy, Lucy in her arms, the taste of her kiss. Of course that didn't mean the younger woman felt the same way. But maybe she did.

"Roberta?"

"Maybe...I don't know."

"Who?"

She hesitated to answer him it wasn't her place to speak for Lucy.

"Somebody I know?" Jimmy pressed.

"Does it really matter."

"I guess not really just curious."

They sat for a bit before the distant echo of shoes on the pavement broke the cocoon of silence. Roberta opened the car door to get out, "Let's get together for lunch this week sometime."

"Okay. I'm free Wednesday what about you?"

"Wednesday is good," he watched as she exited the car taking in her grace and elegance one last time.

"Roberta," he called out.

"Yes," she leaned down to peer into the car.

"Take care of yourself."

"You too Jimmy." She watched as he drove off then climbed the stairs to her front door. She was almost inside the door when the phone began ringing. She rushed to answer it before her voicemail did, "Lucy?"

"No it's me Jimmy."

"Oh Jimmy what."

"You left your jacket in the car. Could you come outside and get it please I don't want to double park," with that he abruptly disconnected the call. Roberta stared at the receiver in her hand for a moment, before returning it to its cradle with a sense of foreboding.

Jimmy stood leaning against the hood of his car her jacket draped over his left arm while with his right hand he jingled the keys to her house. He sneered at her as he held the keys out dropping them at her feet when she finally standing in front of him. She slowly crouched down to pick up the keys never taking her eyes off of him as she did so. If the look on his face didn't speak volumes as to his condemnation then certainly his voice did, "I'm younger than you are. Kevin was younger still but Lucy?"

"Jimmy."

"You know it occurred to me over dinner but I figured no way. Not even you Roberta would stoop so low as to date a child," he snorted contemptuously, "Obviously I was wrong." He flung her coat at her, "I feel sick just looking at you."

"That's enough Jimmy," they both, he and Roberta, turned to find Lucy stepping out of the shadows cast by the street lamps. "You okay Bobbi," she murmured as she placed a reassuring hand in the small of the older woman's back.

"I'm fine. We were just talking."

"This is between."

"Shut up Jimmy! Go home. I'll see you at work on Monday we can talk about this then."

"Lucy this is ridiculous get in the car," he blindly groped behind his back for the car door handle and opened the passenger side door, "Get in I'm taking you home now."

"No you're not."

"Lucy." his voice rose as he stepped forward and reached for her, "get in the car now."

"No. Don't touch me." She stepped back just out of his reach, "C'mon Bobbi let's go inside."

"I never figured you for a muff diver Lucy."

"Or your mother apparently but I guess that makes us even; I never figured you to be an asshole." Throughout their exchange Roberta had been silent now she spoke up.

"Stop it both of you. My neighbors do not need to know my business. Jimmy you're upset and I can understand that but you need to calm down before you say something you'll regret later. The same goes for you Lucy."

They both looked contrite and mumbled out apologies.

"What are you doing for lunch on Wednesday?"

"Homework," Lucy cringed inwardly talk about sounding like a child.

"Jimmy?" He sighed and nodded his consent to the unasked question.

"Thank you. Jimmy and I were going to have lunch on Wednesday why don't you join us and the three of us can talk about this like rational adults."

"Fine"

"Good it's settled then Wednesday one o'clock my chambers." She left them there standing by the car as she once again climbed the stairs to her front door and went inside.

"I'll see you Monday Jimmy." Lucy turned to follow in the older woman's footsteps.

"Lucy?"

"Yeah." She stopped walking but did not turn around to face him.

"I'm sorry I called you a," now that he was somewhat calmer her couldn't bring himself to use the derogatory term he'd hurled at her earlier. " Well you know."

"Thanks," now she turned to face him once again. "I know you're not an asshole."

"I was just acting like one," he smiled wanly. "I just...I don't understand."

"And I couldn't explain it to you if I tried. I can hardly explain it to myself."

He looked past her, over her shoulder at Roberta who was watching them from the living room window. "Someone's waiting for you. You should go."

She glanced up at the window, "I should shouldn't I," her heart started beating a mile a minute. "Bye Jimmy."

He watched her climb the steps and ring the doorbell. Then he got in his car and drove off.

Roberta opened the door before the first bell tone sounded and pulled Lucy inside, "I'm sorry you had to."

"I'm not." And then Lucy was in her arms, soft full lips pressed to Roberta's own. They kissed hungrily finally breaking apart with a gasp for air. "I'm so not sorry."

"You sure?"

"Very."

"Thank God."