Title: Perchance to Dream

Author: Alan Hitchen

Email: darkmere2000@yahoo.co.uk

Feedback: Would be nice

Disclaimer: X:WP belongs to Renaissance Pictures – Universal Television

Rating: PG-13

Information: Follows on from the episode Is There a Doctor in the House?

“Xena. I wanted to thank you for saving my life – again – you always seem to be doing that,” said Gabrielle, as she hobbled out of the temple.

“It was your decision to come back.”

“How could I leave you. You have so many wars to stop and despots to foil, you’re going to need my help.”

“I couldn’t do it without you, but you’ll have to rest up for a while,” replied her concerned companion, as she helped Gabrielle down the temple steps.

“You’re not going to believe this, but I had the most amazing dream when I was on the other side. Do you want to hear about it?”

“I can’t wait, but save your strength for now, and you can tell me everything when we make camp for the night.”

Later that day Xena finds a comfortable place for an exhausted Gabrielle to rest. She tenderly checks Gabrielle’s wounds to see they are still properly bound, then busies herself with the mundane tasks of life. She first sees to the needs of her faithful horse, Argo, then fetches the water from the nearby stream, builds the fire, prepares and cooks the meal. Gabrielle watches the domestic activity she would normally do with a keen interest.

“You know, now that your cooking has improved, you’d make someone a wonderful wife,” she opines playfully, as Xena serves up the rabbit stew.

“Yes, I thought so once.” A flicker of regret passes over her face only to become a smile. “Is the stew okay?”

“This is delicious. If I’m going to be treated like this I must get myself killed more often.”

Xena angrily snaps back. “Don’t ever say that, even in jest!”

Instantly contrite, Gabrielle apologises. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” An awkward pause follows. “I know how bad I felt when I thought I’d lost you to poison not so long ago, but you weren’t really dead then, were you?”

“No, it just looked like I was.”

“But I was really dead, wasn’t I?”

“Yes, you were really dead. I knew it, the others knew it, but I couldn’t accept it, I wouldn’t let you go, not without a fight.”

“So that’s why I’m black and blue.” Gabrielle winces as she feels her bruised sternum.

“I’m sorry about that, but I was desperate, I didn’t know what else to do.”

Xena’s pained expression says more than words ever could. They finish the meal in silence.

“I was going to tell you about my dream, wasn’t I,” said Gabrielle suddenly. “I don’t recall all that occurred after the attack, all I know is that I was in great pain and distress, then suddenly I wasn’t, all my pain ceased, it was dark and silent, and I knew something had happened to me, but I didn’t know what.”

“I became aware of a spot of light that grew and grew, enfolding me in its brilliance, and when it faded I found myself standing in an unfamiliar landscape.”

“A handsome man, clad in brilliantly coloured raiment, came to greet me and act as my guide to the afterlife. He took me by the hand and led me to a huge barren valley. One side of the valley was covered in flames, the other blanketed in snow. As I watched human souls were being flung from side to side by some unseen force. I should have been horrified, but I felt strangely calm in the presence of the man. I asked him if this was Tartarus. He shook his head, and told me it was a temporary place for sinners who might yet be redeemed if prayers were said for them.”

“He led me through the valley to a bottomless pit situated at the far end. It was filled with souls held in eternal torment. ‘This is Hell, the final destination for unrepentant sinners’, he said. I could not bear this terrible sight for long, so he led me away, and we moved on through rugged countryside. Across a river, we reached a bright flower-strewn meadow. Here we found happy people playing and enjoying each other’s company. It was here that I met my grandmother and uncle and other people who knew me. They were surprised but nonetheless pleased to see me.”

“My guide explained that this was a place for people with slightly imperfect souls awaiting entry into true Heaven itself, a brighter more fragrant place than even this paradise.”

“I hoped my guide might take me there, but then I heard your voice calling me, softly at first, but becoming louder and more urgent all the time. I knew I must return so I turned to the man. He smiled and told me he knew my visit was a temporary one, as my time of final departure had not yet come, and that he would return me to the land of the living.”

“No sooner had he said so, we were back at the place where I had entered the afterlife. He said farewell, bid me to remember what I had seen and said. ‘The most important thing you’ll ever learn is how to love, and be loved in return. For this is the key to happiness in your world and eternal life in the next.’”

“Then he was gone and it was dark and silent again. I then felt the most tremendous blow to my chest, and the pain began again, so I knew I was back, and I opened my eyes and there I was safe in your arms.”

“That was quite a dream.”

“I don’t know Xena, was it a dream? It seemed so real, yet it wasn’t the Underworld as you have described it to me, or as I have imagined it. If it was a real place where did I go?”

“That I can’t say, all I know is wherever you went you returned to me, and for that I am eternally grateful. Now it’s time for you to sleep, you need it.”

“You’re right. Goodnight Xena, and once again, thank you.”

“Goodnight Gabrielle. Sleep well.”

Gabrielle settled down and soon her stertorous breathing indicated she was safely asleep. Xena remained awake and alert to any change in her condition.

As the sun sank from sight she scrutinised the sleeping form in minute detail. Gabrielle’s physical beauty was obvious to all who saw her, but Xena was looking beyond the obvious. In the short time she had known her Gabrielle had revealed many admirable qualities, but most of all she possessed a youthful innocence that radiated from her and lit up her surroundings, and did so even as darkness fell.

Xena shucked off her armour and prepared to sleep. As she lay on the blanket looking up at the stars, she began to contemplate her own youth and the choices she had made. Where had it all gone wrong?

For reasons that had seemed good at the time, she had advanced step by step, down the road that had led to damnation. She had left people dead, dying, injured, homeless and destitute. Leaving families shattered and communities destroyed, and for what? Only for her to become that which she had originally opposed and hated – a blood-soaked warlord.

But there was hope. She had realised her error, changed her behaviour, and most importantly, gained the friendship and love of Gabrielle, who would be her moral compass to guide her toward the goal of personal redemption. Exoneration for her past crimes is all but impossible, she knew that, but miracles sometimes happen, and after all finding Gabrielle was one such miracle, perhaps there could be another, and with that hopeful thought in mind, she fell asleep.