Title: The Little Things In Life.
Disclaimer: Ain't mine. All the characters belong to Joss Whedon + writers and Mutant Enemy. Luckey basterts :P... I am a poor student so please don't sue me!
Rating: NC-17. For character deaths, violence, language and sex.
Feedback: It's what every author lives for. I would be very happy. Thank you. my email is: firstname.lastname@example.org
Author's note: I'm a girl from Denmark, and not the best at gramma and such, but I've done my best.
Author's note ll: When the text is in italics (like this), it is Faith' thoughts we hear
Authors note IIl: Dawn had already been "made", when Buffy and Joyce came to Sunnydale. Everything happened exactly as in the show, except Faith didn't came back in season 7.
Summery: 4 years after Faith turned herself in, she's getting out of prison. Will she except a new life, and a second chance as a human, and a slayer for The New Council. Can she go back, and heal old wounds? Can old enemies be friends? Will she do the right thing? Or just screw up, like she always does?
"Come on, Faith." The guard said to her. "You earned it.. And if I ever see you again. I'll beat you to death with a shovel." He said, grinning.
Faith liked him, he was funny, he took her serious. And he didn't look down on her, like all the others did. She would miss him, kinda. 'Cause now.. She was very happy, she was getting out of jail. Faith had waited for this moment for 4 years.
4 long years of harassment, from inmates and guards. Every day had been a struggle, but lucky for Faith, she had her slayer strength. Without it, she would have been dead long ago. But it was also her slayer abilities, that had gotten her in prison, in the first place. She cursed, and loved them at the same time.
Outside, Faith is met by two men, in tweed suits. "You gotta be kidding me." She mumbles to herself.
One of the men approached her. "Faith Winters?" Faith stopped in front of the man, he was shorter than her. She looked up and down of him, trying to figure out what kind of man he was. If he was just another old fart, with a bamboo stick stuck up his gangees, like Wesley had been. Or if he was more like Giles. She hoped he was kinda like Giles.
Thinking of Giles, she got kinda sad. But she quickly shrug the feeling away.
She answered the man. "What d'ya want?" She crossed her arms in front of her chest. She would show them, she wasn't afraid. But she put her feet in attack position, so she would be ready, if they attacked her. Though it wasn't likely they would do anything in broad daylight and in front of a prison. But knowing watchers, she expected it.
"We are from The New Watchers Council. Are you Faith?"
"Who else would I be?" The man put out his hand, waiting for Faith to shake it. She thought about it for a couple of seconds, thinking it was a trap. But she decided to try to give them a chance. So she took it.
"I am Nicholas Saunders." The tweed man said.
"Faith. But you already knew that." She shook his hand shortly, and let go again.
"What do you want?" Faith asked, sounding kinda curious.
"We would like you to come to England." Nicholas answered. He sounded honest enough, but Faith was still skeptical.
"To England? With you? And what would I do in England?" Faith looked like a big question mark.
Oookayyy.. Where did that come from?
"You will be given a new chance, a new life as a slayer. And your record will be cleared." Faith took a step closer to him, invading his personal space. She bend down, so her face was at the same level as Nicholas'.
"Is this another one of your lame tricks? 'Cause if it is" Nicholas knew this was just Faith' defencive mechanism. To threaten people when she didn't quite knew what was going on, or if she was scared. And he could sense that Faith was not scared.
"No it is not a trick." Nicholas said with confidant. He needed Faith to understand that he was not kidding and that this was not a trap to capture her on behalf of The Council. But Faith wasn't quite convinced yet.
"I thought the council was blown up, and the watchers killed?" She asked. "It was. But we, the few survivors, rebuilt it. And now it stands stronger than ever, with all the new slayers. We have slayers in every country now." Nicholas spoke, sounding rather proud of it all.
"Riiight.. Then why do you need me? Sounds like you have all the slayers you need." Faith knew a bit about it. Angel had visited her a couple of times, filling her in on it all. So she couldn't understand why they would have her back. They still had Buffy.. So why her? This wasn't making much sense. She was torn out of her thoughts, by Nicholas' voice.
"We believe in giving people a second chance. And you did show some signs, that you could be a great slayer. Maybe even one of the greatest. You would help out, training, and just be there for the girls.. So we are giving you that chance. It is up to you to take it, or not." He handed her an envelope.
"Here is a passport, plane ticket, some money and directions to the Council in England. We are giving you a couple of days to decide, if you are joining us.. Good day Faith." With that, the two men left.
Faith was stunned. One of the greatest?.. What the hell just happened? This was making even less sense. Faith looked at the envelope, for how long, she didn't know. After several minutes, or so, she opened it.
It contained, what Nicholas had said it would. Faith needed someplace, were she could think in peace and quiet.
She found a hotel, and got a room. She looked around the room. It was quite nice. She sat down on the bed. At least the watcher-man had given her enough money for a decent hotel, and not one of those dark and damp, she had been used to, before she when to jail. And jail was also dark and damp. Actually she had never known anything else..
Except Buffy Summers' house. She had always liked the Summers house, and the inhabitants. Especially them.
Joyce had always been like a mother to her.
Buffy, the sister, and friend, she never had.
And Dawn.. Well Dawn had been Dawn.. Funny, charming, she had the cutest smile, and..
--> FLASHBACK <--
Faith stood outside in the back yard of the Summers house.
It was dark, but ironically there was a beautiful full moon.
She was starring up at Dawns window.
There was no light lit in the house, but she knew Dawn was in her room, sleeping.
Faith had been standing in the yard for about an hour. She had to gather her courage.
When she finally had it, she climbed up to Dawns room, knocking lightly on the glass.
When that didn't work, she knocked again, a little harder.
Dawn woke up and opened the window, letting Faith in.
"Hi Faith. It's a little late, isn't it?" Dawn said in a teasing voice, with a smile on her face. She didn't mind Faith being in her room, in the middle of the night, at all.
Faith stood in the room, looking nervous and scarred as hell. Dawn got concerned.
"What's wrong? You ok?"
"yeah, 5 by 5." Faith almost cut her of.
"Look" Faith continued. "I just want..."
Dawn stepped closer to Faith.
"You can tell me, Faith."
But Faith didn't say more.
Instead, she leaned in, kissing Dawn. The kiss was light, but full of passion.
At first Dawn was taken aback, but she quickly warmed up to the kiss, loving the feeling of Faiths' lips against hers.
Faith pulled back, taking Dawns face in her hands, cupping her cheeks. She then whispered to Dawn.
"I'm sorry I have to do this to you.. I love you... Goodbye Dawn."
Before Dawn could say or do anything, Faith jumped out the window and ran as fast as she could.
She ended up in the Mayor's office.
That night was one of the worst of her life. But it was at the same time, the best.
She had kissed the girl she was deeply in love with.
--> END OF FLASHBACK <--
No. Don't think of them. Of her.. It just hurts. Why am I always thinking of them? STOP!!
She shouted in her mind. Her hands were clenched, so her knuckles turned white. Faith was angry with herself, for thinking of the Summers women.
She had hurt them SO much. She just wished she could go back and beat some sense into herself, for the choices she had made then.
Why! Why had she gone over to the Mayer? Why hadn't she excepted the help?
A tear came down her cheek, but she quickly whipped it away. She needed to do something.
The sun was going down, so she decided a patrol was a thing she could do. Though it had been five years since she had been patrolling, she had kept up her skills the best she could.
She had done a lot of weight lifting, and had taken up yoga. She was stronger and more flexible then ever before. She hadn't been training with any weapons, go figure, but she had a good feeling she could remember how to use them.
It's not something you easily forget. I need weapons, though.
Faith went knife hunting. She found a little weapons store, in the small part of town, they had some good knifes. She bought four, one for each hand, and one for each boot. She made a couple of stakes, and went hunting for some demon ass to kick and kill.
It's nice, just to walk 'round, where I want to. No guards, telling me not to do that and that. No inmates, insulting or threatening me, not that they could hurt me, much. I've missed that SO MUCH.. I have always liked walking 'round at night. The quietness. I don't like day that much. It's always warm, well in Cali it is anyway, the sun's always in your eyes. I've never been comfortable 'round to many people, either. I have acted like I didn't care, but I hated it. And I still hate it. I just want it to be me, and a few friends. Not like I have any, but I can dream, right? Ok. I'm talking to myself again, well thinking.. I should be paying attention to what it is I'm doing.
Faith was walking around, trying to see if she could sense any vampires or demons, but it was either a quiet night, or there were not any evil in this part of town.
Damn, I've missed this. The hunting. To kill the bad guys. To do good in this fucked up world. Sometimes I don't think the world deserves to be saved, well the people in it. But I do it anyway. It's who I am. The slayer. The Chosen one.. Well, not One anymore, but still Chosen.
I wonder how it is now, with so many slayers to back you up. Who knows what it's like, to have the weight of the world on your shoulders. I heard some of them are barely more then 12 years old.. Poor girls. I don't want them to go through all this. All this crazy stuff, demon shit..
Faith stopped dead in her track. She looked around, seeing, and sensing nothing, she started running back to the hotel. Her mind was set. She was going to help those girls understanding their powers, and to help train them.
When she reached the hotel, she just packed the few things she owned, and went for the airport, and for the first flight to London.
In the plane, Faith's thoughts started to drift to the Summers women again.
I wonder if they're there, Buffy and Dawn. And the rest of the Scooby gang. Xander, Red, Giles.. The lot. I'm sure they hate me, and I don't blame them.. Heck, I deserve it, God damn it!
She sighed heavily, and closed her fists into two tight balls, her nails cutting into her palms, making them bleed. She was angry with herself again. Cursing everything she had ever done to them.
Damn! Now I'm bleeding. I can't even think of them, without.. I don't think I can face them. I can't.. But I have to. I have to try and make things right between us.. Well, I guess I can't ever make 'em right, but I have to try.. That damn shrink in jail said it would be a good idea, to try and do some of the wrong things, right.. So I'll try..
"I'll try!" Faith whispered to nobody. She wasn't even aware she'd said it out loud. But most of the people in the plane were asleep. So nobody heard her anyway.
During the long flight, Faith thought of how she would approach the Scooby's. She knew they were in England, training all the potentials, all the new slayers. Faith still had difficulty to comprehend, that there were no more "Chosen One" anymore. No more being alone with it all..
I guess I'll have to get use to it. There's nothing I can do to change it, not that I'd do it if I could. I'm looking forward to see the girls in action, see if the Scoobys done it good enough. But since they're all alive, I guess they have. Well, not all of them are alive, but. They did the best they could. I could've never done what they have done. Never. I mean.. I gotta stop having this talk thing in my head. I bet it's not even healthy. I'm going crazy.. See. That's what prison'll do to you. You go crazy, and "talk" to yourself. It's that shrink.. He got me all crazy. Said I had to think of it all. All the things I've done, try to. How was it he put it.. Oh yeah, try to make peace with my inner self, and shit. Ha. As if that's possible.. Big stupid shrink man.. He's got me to always contradict myself. I've begun to say one thing, then change it. It's frustrating...
Faith was getting very frustrated, she needed to let of some steam, but on an airplane, it's not something you can do. So, she had to wait until she got to England.
The sun was shining down on Faith, as she entered a big, medieval building, in the outskirts of London. It looked like an old fortress, of some kind. It was surrounded by a big stone wall, also medieval looking. In the foyer, Faith went to the front desk, were a young man stood.
"Hello." He said with a heavy British accent. "Can I help you?" "Yeah. I'm Faith. Is Nicholas 'round?" The man at the desk took an extra look at Faith. He had an odd look on his face.
What now?! Does everybody here know who I am? Here I thought I could just.. Kinda blend in. If everybody knows, it's gonna be a bitch.. Well. Guess I have to get used to it...
"Just a second. I'll see if he is in his office." The desk man said.
While Faith was waiting, she looked around the foyer. It was kinda big, maybe 10 by 15 meters. It had a homey feeling to it, there were two couches in the corner, the room had a lot of wood in it. It had that London homey feel to it. Faith liked it.
"Excuse me, Faith?"
"Huh, what? Oh right, sorry" Faith had been in her own mind, not hearing the man at the desk talk to her.
"That's ok. Nicholas is in his office. It is up the stairs on the third floor. Then turn right, down the corridor. His office is at the end of it." He said with a polite smile. "Thanks dude." Was what he got from Faith. She went up the stairs. Nicholas' office was easy to find.
Okay.. I'm here.. Why am I so nervous? My hands are shakin.. Ok, get a grip on yourself Faith. It's good you're here.. Isn't it? Ok.. Stop shakin and get your ass in there.. And stop talking to yourself!...
Faith knocked, and waited for an answer. It felt like hours, but it was only a couple of seconds, before she heard a "Come in, Faith."
How can he know it's me??
Faith opened the door, and went inside. "Yo Nicky boy." Faith and her nick-names. But it's who she is.
"Hello Faith." Nicholas said, amused over his new nick-name. It didn't matter what he had heard or read about Faith, he thought she deserved a new chance. And he kinda liked her.
"Take a seat, please." He said in his British way. "So you decided to drop in, ay?" "Well. Yeah I did.. Thought I might see what all 'tis is 'bout, ya know" Faith said with her Boston accent, and sat down in one of the two chairs in front of the big desk in the middle of the room. Nicholas was sitting behind it in a big comfy looking office chair.
Faith looked around his office. She was kinda impressed by it.
It was nice and medium size, and it had a homey feel to it. He had some plants and pictures around the room.
Faith guessed it was pictures of his family. Placed against one of the walls was a big leather couch, big enough to sleep on, and it didn't look like it would be an uncomfortable sleep either.
"Love the office, dude. Very homey." Faith said.
Nicholas looked Faith in the eyes, to see if she was being sarcastic. They held each others gaze, mesmerized and intrigued by the other.
Faith broke the gaze, feeling a bit uncomfortable by the whole episode, her future meeting with the Scooby's.. And Dawn.
A minute passed since they first had taken the others gaze. "Thank you, Faith. I had my slayer, Aly, help me decorate it. She wants to be a house decorator."
Faith took an extra look at the slayers work. "She did a good job." She said. She could tell Nicholas was proud of his slayer. She was beginning to like Nicky.
"She also painted that picture for me." He pointed at a 1 by 1 meter painting, that hung over the leather couch. "She said she thought about the guidance and training." Nicholas thought it might be a good idea to open up. To tell Faith personal things, to gain her trust.
Faith stood up and walked over too the painting, to study it closer. She could see that there had been a lot of of passion and feelings behind the work.
Nicholas and his slayer must be close. They must care for each other deeply.. Like I did for my first watcher... I really miss her, still.
Nicholas spoke again. "She's quite a handful, but at times she can be so funny and sweet. She's only 14, but she seem like she's 20. And yet at times she acts like the kid she is. She's a great slayer. You'll see that when you get to train her."
Faith had been studying the painting, listening to Nicholas talk. But when she heard that she would be training his, obviously precious, slayer, she spun around, looking at him with big questioning eyes. It sounded like Nicky trusted her to be near his slayer.
Nicholas understood what Faith must be thinking. "yes, Faith. I trust her with you.. And I know you are going to do a good job, training her and the other slayers."
Faith walked back to the chair and sat down. She looked him in the eyes for a long time, trying to figure him out.
After a couple of minutes, she spoke with a tiny voice. "But.. I'm a murderer."
Nicholas thought of how he should respond to that, for a moment.
"Maybe you were a murderer, then." He underlined the word, then.
"But not anymore.. You went to prison, you turned yourself in. You did your time.. I believe you have learned from your mistakes, and that you have changed..
And I also believe that all that happened in Sunnydale wasn't your fault. You were scared and alone. You never fit in with Buffy and her friends.
You felt like and outsider.. They didn't get to know you, the real you.
You were confused and scared, and the Mayer used that to trick you to join him.
But I don't think that that was were you wanted to be..
All I think you wanted was some real friends, a family. You wanted someone to trust and understand you..
And I think what you wanted the most. Was love."
Faith was slumped together in the chair, her head rested on her knees, she had pulled to her chest. All the things Nicky had said was true.
He's really hitting home-base here.. And how the hell does he know all that has happened?
"I am no shrink, I am not analyzing you. But I am a people person, I'm pretty good at reading people and their moods. The only thing I know about you, is what I have read, and from talking to the people from Sunnydale.
I am not judging you, Faith. And I am not you watcher.
I would like to, maybe, be your friend in this place.
You seem like an interesting person, and I would like to get to know you better..
Though, not in a romantic way, I have a lovely wife, whom I love very dearly."
Nicholas let Faith think about his offer, while he studied her.
Faith was just speechless. All the things Nicky had said was absolutely true. And she could sense he was for real. And she did want friends, real friends.
So Faith reached a decision.
"Uhmm.. Sure. Friends.. I can do that." She gave him a genuine smile, and reached out her hand for Nicky to shake.
He stood up and walked around his desk, to stand in front of Faith. She stood up as well, still her hand out-stretched.
Nicholas took it with both of his. They had an understanding. He let go, and sat in the other chair in front of the desk.
"Now.. If I know slayers, I bet you're hungry, right?" Faith laughed. "Yeah, you know slayers, Nicky.. When aren't we hungry?!"
After they had eaten, Nicholas had showed Faith to her room, and new home, if all went well.
She had chosen to live amongst the other slayers, instead of in the other wing, were the teachers and watchers. And the Scooby's, lived. She thought it might be better to not live too close to the Scooby's
The room was three times the size of her old cell. She liked it already.
The room had a double bed, a small desk with a chair. Two closets for clothing, and one closet for weapons. It had a couple of shelves on the walls, and a T.V.
It was a nice room, it just needed a bit of personality.
Faith began to unpack her few belongings.
Man I need to buy some stuff.. Like some clothes and definitely some good weapons and shit.
(To be continued)