Title: Lovers and Friends

Author: Mel M/Misty

Email: SSailorUranuss@aol.com

Toy Soldiers 2

~ Step by step
Heart to heart (heart to heart)
Left right left
We all fall down (all fall down)
Like Toy Soldiers
Bit by bit (bit by bit)
Torn apart (torn apart)
We never win
But the battle wages on
For Toy Soldiers ~

Faith sighed deeply. Nicole had invited her and Giles to stay at the Julian estate for as long as they needed but it depressed her. She could feel something in the air, something so familiar that it scared her. She knew what that feeling was and she wanted to run away from it but she was needed here. Tonight would be the time Cirrus would want to strike, suck power out of anything he could because it was Halloween.

Her eyes gazed at the window from afar. The curtains were closed but she longed to see daylight again. She would give anything just to be human again, anything.

"Faith?"

"Yeah?"

"It's time to prepare."

"Right." Faith looked at the watcher like she was gonna speak but let her head fall as she thought, 'whoever you are, stop doing this to yourself. Drugs destroyed a big part of my life, don't let them ruin yours as well.' Faith then analyzed her thought and grinned. It seemed that death had actually brought her more compassion, more love and this time around she wouldn't hide from her emotions. She felt free somehow and it felt great.

~ It's getting hard to wake up in the morning
My head is spinning constantly ~

"Good morning," Brooke chirped.

Sam held her head in pain. "For some of the living it is," she growled, popping a few Aspirin.

"Gee, what crawled into your bed and bit you?" Brooke replied, her smitten smirk now fading into a worried frown.

Sam hear the sound of a horn honking and leapt out of her chair. "See you later," she said, grabbing her bag and heading out the door.

Brooke sighed heavily. She was worried about Sam. Things seemed to be changing between them, like their sisterly bond was slowly breaking. The only time she ever saw her these days was when she decided to stay home for dinner or right before curfew when they were both so tired they couldn't even speak. Brooke had also noticed Sam looking more pale and tired than usual which was the first sign that something was wrong. She was determined to out what but right now she was more focused on CJ and their plans.

Sam got in the car and smiled.

"Wake and bake!" they all chanted then laughed.

"Are you really that stupid bitch?" he laughed, stabbing the needle into her arm.

"Get the fuck away from me asshole," she cried.

He pushed her away, the needle finding its way out of her arm but leaving a broad gash from the brutal force that had been used to rip it out. "Have a nice day," he whispered to her brazenly then drifted into the crowd. 'Die alone you pesky little bitch,' he thought with a twisted smile.

She held her arm in pain and ran as fast as she could, sobbing in agony and fury. She rushed past an older man and accidentally hit his cloaked friend with her shoulder. "Sorry," she wept, more in pain than apology. Then she began to run again.

As she ran the cloaked person watched. "Giles, that girl, she's hurt."

"What do you mean? She merely bumped into you."

"No, somebody hurt her. I could smell the blood. What's weird is I also smelt Sam on her."

"Sam?"

"I'm gonna follow her. You track down Brooke and see what she's up to."

Giles looked at her with sheer amazement consuming his face. He was usually the one who took charge and gave orders but now it seemed he would have a second in command when Buffy wasn't around. It was nice to know Faith was being responsible.

Faith watched cautiously as the girl stopped in front of a house and knocked on the door. Faith had told Giles about smelling the blood and Sam on this female but what she hadn't told him was that she smelt fear on this mortal. She also sensed a strong will to warn those she knew of what or who she'd seen which led the ex slayer to one conclusion. Cirrus had arrived.

Sam opened the door. "Hey Mel, what's up?"

Faith nodded. Her assumptions were right on the dot. Now she knew who to watch and how closely she had to watch them.

Mel hurried in, knowing something had followed her. "W-where's C-Chris?" she stammered.

Shannon peeked in with a smile. "Hey stranger. Stopped by for the private party?"

"She wants to talk to Chris."

Chris came down the stairs, a worried look on her face. "Mel?"

Mel clutched her left arm with her right hand. "He's back," she breathed with a hitch of fear as she spoke.

"Are you ok?" Chris whispered, touching Mel's shoulder gently, still not seeing her arm.

Mel flinched as her whole body quivered.

"You're shaking, what's wrong?" Sam whispered, concerned.

"Did he. . ." Chris stopped and let her eyes meet the ground.

"He tried," Mel whispered.

Chris noticed a trickle of blood escaping from Mel's fingers and gasped. "Can I have a look?"

Mel let her hand fall to her side as Chris moved closer to examine the wound.

Sam and Shannon went pale at the sight of the gaping void that use to be a part of the girls arm.

"He got you pretty bad. Shan, get in my medical drawer and bring me the big black box. Sam, check her bag for any bugs or suspicious items."

5 minutes later. . .

"I didn't find anything suspicious in her bag."

"Good, she's now being tracked. Mel, sweetie, take this. It'll help the pain."

Mel nodded and took it, begging the powers that be to make the torture stop long enough for her to fall asleep.

Chris stood. "Get some rest." She kissed Mel on the forehead and led the others into the living room.

"Ok who the hell did this? And what the hell is the 411? I have a right to know," Sam demanded, both angry and afraid.

"You tell her Chris. I-I can't," Shannon whispered, clinging onto Chris.

"His name's Cirrus Steele. He use to be our dealer. That's all he was to us. He hung out with Bitch McQueen and her crew. Well, anyway, sophomore year around the same time Shan came back he told Mel he loved her. Of course as you know Mel's a lesbian and she told him so but he refused to believe that. He disappeared for about two weeks after that. To make a long story short, Spring break rolled around and Mel came up missing. He drugged and raped her. She blocked those memories out but he sent us tapes of everything. We were gonna go to the police but the tapes vanished along with our old pal Cirrus. He messed her up really bad, chic. She was so messed up that it made Bundy's work look like art. He loved hurting her and taking pleasure in it. He wrote to me before he left. He told me he'd kill her next time and all of us while he was at it. Now he's back and as far as I can tell he's pulling through with his promise. This was just a warning. I'm not gonna let him take her. Not this time. She's like a sister to me and no matter how much of a bitch she is to me she'll always be my sister. Sisters fight for each other and that fucker has one pissed off bitch tracking him now," Chris explained with narrowed eyes.

Sam was mortified. She looked like she'd just been impaled with a very dull blade. "God, that's horrible. Why didn't she fight back?"

"She couldn't, for more than one reason but now she can."

Sam walked into the bedroom and sat beside the sleeping girl. "I'll do all I can to help," she whispered as she touched her forehead.

"Sammy, what's up? Come to board or score some stuff?"

"Hey Tech. Came to score some x. Got any?"

"Sorry chic, I only do needle business. Check it though. Here's my main man CJ, he can get you anything you want at a sweet price."

"Hi. Sam right? Pleased to meet you," CJ said softly.

"Pleased to meet you too. Got any x?"

"You really cut to the chase. Here's the deal. You get your first bracelet free and if you buy from me regularly everything is half the normal price. Take it and enjoy," he replied, handing her a bracelet and his card.

"Peace and I'll be in touch."

Sam drifted into the room Mel was in and sat next to the bed. "Hey you."

"Hey," Mel whispered softly.

"How you feelin?"

"Ok but you look like hell worn over."

"I'm just rolling is all."

"Sam, you need to stop. I think you're addicted."

~ How can it be?
How could I be so blind to this addiction?
If I don't stop, the next one's gonna be me ~

"I am NOT addicted!" Sam screamed. She wasn't addicted. So what if she like to play with fire, it wasn't Mel's problem. "This is bullshit. Listen, get better and I'll see you later," Sam mumbled before leaving the room.

~ Only emptiness remains
It replaces all, all the pain
Won't you come out and play with me ~

Mel sighed. That didn't work. Now she had to move onto plan B, bringing in an outside source. She picked up the phone and dialed.

~ Step by step
Heart to heart (heart to heart)
Left right left
We all fall down (all fall down)
Like Toy Soldiers
Bit by bit (bit by bit)
Torn apart (torn apart)
We never win
But the battle wages on
For Toy Soldiers ~

"Hello?"

"Brooke?"

"Who is this?"

"Don't hang up on me. Sam's in trouble."

"I'm listening."

"I'm worried Brooke. She's doing drugs, too many too much. I'm not trying to bust her or anything I just don't want her to hurt herself."

"Mel, I think I was wrong about you. Thank you so much for telling me. I'm sorry, about everything. Maybe sometime we could sit and talk."

~ You never win
Hoooooo oooh
Only emptiness remains (Oh hoh)
It replaces all, all the pain
Won't you come out and play with me ~

"That would be great. I'll see you at school on Monday." With that they hung up.

Brooke winced. Maybe it was CJ that had problems and not Mel but that would be something she'd investigate later. Right now she had to help Sam.

~ Step by step
Heart to heart (heart to heart)
Left right left
We all fall down (all fall down)
Like Toy Soldiers
Bit by bit (bit by bit)
Torn apart (torn apart)
We never win
But the battle wages on (Wages on, on, on, on, on)
For Toy Soldiers

Step by step (On)
Heart to heart (heart to heart)
Left right left
We all fall down (All fall down, all fall down. Hoooooo oooh)
Like Toy Soldiers
Bit by bit (bit by bit)
Torn apart (torn apart)
We never win
But the battle wages on
For Toy Soldiers ~

Halloween Night

The night was upon them for daylight was falling fast. The sun was setting and the fun was just beginning.

"Sam?"

Sam spun around and smiled. "Hey Faith. What brings you to Santa Monica? Vamp hunt?"

"Demon hunt among other things. How are you? You look a little pale." Faith could smell the weed and alcohol on Sam and she didn't like it one bit.

"I'm fine. Going to a friends house for Halloween." She looked at her watch. "Yikes, I'd better get going."

"Ok. See ya around," Faith assured as the other brunette headed off. That was when she heard a distant scream coming from far behind her. She lurked in the shadows as she made her way closer to the scream with increasing speed. Then she saw what was going on. She leapt out of the shadows, scooping the girl up in her arms and setting her away from the angry vampire. "Hey, no picking on the young ladies."

"And you're gonna stop me little girl?" the vampire growled, baring his fangs.

Faith laughed. "Yeah, I'm gonna stake you." She bared her own fangs and let out a primal roar as she leapt at him, catching him off guard. He didn't put up much of a fight seeing as Faith was beating the hell outta him. With one last swift rush she pierced his heart with a stake. "Dusted!" she panted, her face returning to normal as she turned to look at the girl.

"Faith?"

"Hey Lil. Since when did you become vamp bait?"

"Huh?" Lily replied, confused.

"You've got quite a nice get up there. Startin to look like me and B put together."

Lily blushed. "That was the whole point. Guess he attacked me cause I looked like a slayer," she laughed.

"You headed to a party?"

"Yeah, I was. Changed my mind though. I'm just not in a party mood."

"You look like you are. Sexy little pink shirt, black leather jacket and black leather pants. You look like you're ready to kick some serious ass! Where you hiding that stake?"

"Thanks. No stakes."

"Where's Carmen?"

"I don't know," Lily sighed.

"Let me guess, you split?"

"It didn't feel right."

"You know what! I think you need to chill and I got a perfect way of doin so. You could come demon hunting with me, if you want. Fighting relieves stress, especially when you know it's for a good cause."

"Ok, but I'm not killing anything. No matter how evil it is!"

"Cool. I'll do the killing, you just help me find him."

"Him? Does he have a name?"

"Cirrus."

"I've heard of him. We might wanna go ask Brooke if she knows anything about him."

"Nic, could you grab my costume from under my bed?" Brooke yelled from the bathroom.

Nic rolled her eyes as she searched under the bed. She pulled out the bag the costume was in but found her eyes drawn to an old magik book that had fallen out with the bag. She scrunched her eyebrows and decided to talk to Brooke about it later as she took the bag to her lady love.

"This it?"

"Yup."

"What is it?"

"Well, you're a sexy vamp, so I am your sexy victim," Brooke answered with a grin.

"What now? Continue to walk? Seems like that's all we can do."

"Yeah."

"You know, I don't think I've told you how beautiful you look tonight. You really should wear things like that more often."

"You're not too great at come on lines but thanks. I just thought of Halloween and you popped into me head. How does it feel? Being a vampire I mean."

"It's great, minus the daylight factor, crosses, stakes, bloodlust and paleness. Ok, so maybe it's not so great but I have no choice." Faith sighed.

"Faith. . ." Lily grabbed the vampire and tentatively kissed her.

"Well, well, well. If it isn't Lily Espasito and my sweet little Faith."

They both looked in the direction of the voice to find a cloaked man before them.

"There he is," Mel panted, approaching with Chris and Sam.

Coming from the other direction, toward the party, was the sexy vamp and her sexy victim. They saw the gathering and Nicole spoke up. "Is this a private party or are we invited?"

"Welcome," the man said with a grin. He threw the hood off of his head, receiving a shriek from both Nic and Sam.

"I'm glad you're all here. I have a few things to say. First I'd like to speak with my precious Faith."

"I'm not yours," Faith growled.

"But you are. You see, before Brooke summoned me I was in Sunnydale and I dug you up. Worked a little harmless mojo to bring you back and then I bit you. How does it feel Faith? How does it feel to be a killer?"

Nicole shot a glare at Brooke. "You what?" she growled.

"It was an accident, I swear."

"I'm not a killer. I save innocents and I drink pigs blood."

Lily felt sick as she shuttered at the thought of drinking any kind of blood.

"Then there's Brooke. I'm very pleased she decided to be a witch or I might have never gotten the chance to come back here to Santa Monica. I bet you're dying to know what I am, aren't you Faith? I'm like your blonde friend Anya. A vengeance demon, with fangs. Oh, and I'm a vampire. Prone to everything accept stakes. Spells are handy. Not to mention that tasty lil treat I had on my way here. Carmen was quite the screamer. Anyway, Brooke gave me a few rules then set me loose to hurt Mel but no killing or wounding too badly. She wanted revenge on my behalf but she didn't know the whole story. Maybe if any of you live Mel can tell it to you some time. Well, not with that needle sticking out of her arm but maybe in time. Oh, one more thing before I kill all of you. Sammy, you'll have to find another dealer cause tomorrow I may be gone. Summoned or dead. I'm a pretty young demon so I don't have much experience in these things. Just letting you know all of my weaknesses so you can put me out of my misery."

Faith glared at him. "C'mon then. Let's dance." Faith appeared behind him, jabbing him in the lower back.

Lily and the others were petrified to hear Carmen was dead but this was not yet a time for mourning.

Cirrus let out a grunt then threw Faith over his shoulder and elbowed her in the stomach.

"You can do better than that," she taunted, jumping to her feet.

CJ swung at her but she ducked then kneed him in the gut. She threw him back and quickly dusted him. She panted softly and looked at the others.

"Sam, we need to talk after the party," Brooke informed

"Ok, see you at the party," Sam replied, walking off.

Nicole stared at Brooke. "We need to talk now. I don't like you jumping into magik. It's fine that you want to do magik but you're going a little too fast hun and I don't think it's safe. Try studying it for a little while and then trying minor spells. No more of this vamp vengeance demon shit, ok?"

Brooke knew Nic was right and nodded with shame.

"Don't you have something to say to Mel?"

"Mel, I'm sorry."

"You should be. Real witches don't use magik for personal gain," she growled.

"Hey, let's get you to the hospital. We need to get that needle out of your arm."

Mel nodded and walked off with Chris.

Brooke sighed as they too headed for the party.

Lily looked at Faith then turned to walk back home.

"Lily, wait."

"Yeah?" the Latina whispered as she turned to face the vampire.

Faith didn't know how to say what she felt so she kissed her, more passionate and less shy than before. Lily melted into the kiss and wrapped her arms around Faith's body. The kiss soon broke but their tight embrace stayed.

"Faith. . ." Lily whispered as she traced the ex slayer's lips with her own.

"I'm staying at Nicole's and they won't be back til late. You wanna come over?"

Lily smiled. "I'd love nothing more than to spend the night with you."

"Sam, you shouldn't be doing drugs."

"I haven't done any tonight."

"Ok, fine, I'll leave you alone but take care of yourself."

"I will."

As Brooke left Sam grinned. She didn't lie to Brooke when she said she hadn't gotten high yet but that didn't mean she wouldn't by the nights end. She pulled out the bracelet CJ had given her that morning and swallowed a couple of the "candies" it bore.

What did you think? Can't wait to see what happens? Well, I'll let you in on a little secret. In the next chapter Brooke takes another blind step into magik, Sam hits rock bottom, Mel gets some action (yup, guest appearance by. . .I'm not gonna tell you!), Faith finds a spell that can cure vampires. . .but there's a catch, Nic is frantic because of certain events and situations (read into that really deep. It'll sota be comic relief but the aftermath wont be a bed of roses) and Willow and Tara come to Santa Monica for a "visit". Have I teased you enough? Will it keep you reading? If so, I'll do this every time I post a fic ^.^ Anyway, gotta go write the next piece so I'll catch ya'll on the flip side!

ttfn (Tigger style) ~<>~ Mel ~<>~

::Sam takes the keyboard::

P.S.
Nicole, if you even attempt to lay a finger on Jos' head I will hurt you myself. Don't be a bitch cause you didn't get your way. These nice people just write what appeals to them or crosses their twisted minds!

::Brooke takes the keyboard away from Sam and hands it back to Mel::

Sorry about that people. She wouldn't leave me alone :: finally clicks the send button::

I'll Be Gone For Christmas

Christmas Eve was upon them and it had come too fast. Sam was still getting high daily but now she put on a show so everybody thought she'd quit. Brooke had played with a little more magik but made sure Nic never found out. Faith had decided to stay in Santa Monica a while but she had called Buffy to give her the 411 on her girl and the others. Lily had been doing ok, seeing as Faith was there to help. They were all still mourning Carmen's death but the pain had begun to dull and life was back to normal. Well, as normal as it could get.

We lay our scene at the palace where Brooke's sitting in her room alone. Mike and Jane were preparing for the next day and Sam was with Chris and Shannon. Brooke sighed as she listened to "Let Her Cry" by Hootie and the Blowfish. "And if the sun come up tomorrow, let her be," she sang. Her and Nic had been fighting way too much. The worst part was that it was all about magik.

"Hey there luv. Heard you're doin some mojo these days."

Brooke's eyes shot open. "How the hell did you get in?"

"Mum invited me in on her way out. Listen, I need to ask a favor of you."

"Oh, ok."

"I need you to work some mojo for me. I'd ask the little witch duo but they ain't too fond of me. So I'm askin you."

"What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to drudge up a mate of mine. The holiday's and all get lonely without anyone to be close with. I just want a familiar face round my crypt."

"Are you gonna give me her name? I know a few spells that deal with summoning people."

"Sorry, can't fork over the name. If the slayer finds out by chance I don't want her buggin out. And she's not human. Matter of fact, she'd dead. Has been for centuries. She got dusted some time back but I really need to see her again."

Brooke smiled. "I'll do it Spike. I know how it is to be without the ones you love. We need to get some supplies and then we can do the spell in the basement." Brooke jumped to her feet then looked outside. No wonder he was around and not burning to death. The sun was hidden by clouds.

"What do we need to get?"

Brooke smiled. "C'mon, I think we might have it in the kitchen."

Spike followed as the blonde led him into their kitchen. "I'd hate to be in this room when the sun's shinin."

Brooke laughed as she searched the cupboards. "It definitely wouldn't be good for your health." She let out a small cheery squeak as she pulled a small bag out of the cupboard. "I'll grab my tools and then we're set."

Spike nodded and headed for the basement. It was dark and musty like his crypt so he felt at home.

Brooke joined him and they made a circle of sand. Brooke mumbled a few words as they sat in it's center.

Spike gave her a questioning look as he watched.

"That was to protect our circle from interference," she explained, then continued. She positioned her tools the way the book told her and she began to recite the spell in its truest form. Latin.

"You speak Latin?"

"No, but I know a little Spanish so I just used that to pronounce the words."

The spell, it seemed, had failed. Brooke frowned. That sucked big time. Then she felt something strange inside. Something unfamiliar.

Spike glanced at the door then back at Brooke. "Holy shit!" he bellowed as he pushed himself away from what Brooke had become.

Brooke looked at him, confused. "Spike, what happened?"

Spike's eyes widen. "Oh bloody hell! Now I have to find a way to bring you back to human!"

"Human? Spike, what happened?"

"I looked away for a bloody second and then poof, you're a God damn cream colored cat with disturbingly bright green eyes."

"I'm a WHAT?" Brooke screeched, looking at her hand, erm, paw. This was great. She'd really done it this time. She muttered the spell again, this time a blue glowing light that appeared as small as a fire fly drifted around the room then shot out the window.

"Great, I'm stuck with a fricken talking cat."

"Take me to Nicole's house. Maybe she can help."

"I found IT!"

"Really? What's it say?"

"It says that the spell can be done easily but that the spell is only found in one book. Other stipulations are that the vampire must not have a soul, drink human blood or belong in this realm."

"Then you're the perfect candidate Faith," Lily giggled, kissing Faith on the cheek.

"Guess I am. I don't drink human blood or have a soul. Sometimes I wonder though."

"Wonder what?"

"If I have a soul."

"Why's that?"

"Because I love you so much that it feels like I'm loving you with my soul."

Lily rested her head on Faith's neck and kissed her gently. "You're such a flatterer, but you knew that."

"I better call Giles to get more info on this book. If I can become human again. . ." Faith swallowed hard at the reminder of how she couldn't see Lily during the day. "The first thing I want to do when I'm human again is go for a walk in the park, with you."

Lily knew how much being a vampire was hurting Faith and it hurt her too but if things went as planned Faith would have a heartbeat and a reflection in no time. Lil picked up the phone and handed it to Faith. "I love you."

Faith smiled. "I love you too baby."

"When are we gonna tell them?"

"When I'm human again. Better throwing it all at them at once instead of in pieces."

Lily nodded as Faith dialed the watcher's number.

"What are you doing here? And what's with the kitty? No felines in my house!"

"Look Nicole, the cat's not just any cat. Invite me in and I'll tell you the whole bloody story. She needs you right now."

Nicole raised a brow. "Ok, you're invited in."

Spike rushed in, making sure the door was locked behind him.

"So what's the scoop?"

Spike sighed. "Should I tell her?"

Brooke purred sweetly and Spike rolled his eyes.

"Right. I heard your girl was doing some mojo so I stopped by to see if she could help me with a problem. Well, she screwed the spell up and now she's Miss Kitty."

Nicole's face flushed as she began to panic. Her girlfriend had turned herself into a cat on Christmas Eve. Just peachy keen! "I'll call Will and Tara." Before Spike could protest Nic was on the phone. Ah the power of mem dial.

"Hello?"

"Uh, hi Buffy. Is Willow there? I really need to talk to her or Tara. It's an emergency."

"Heh, they'll be back soon. They went to get last minute stuff for tomorrows party. Maybe I can help."

"Unless you know some magik to change a witch back into a human, I doubt it."

"What happened?"

"S. . ."

Spike glared at her and nodded. His secret was safe.

"See, Brookie did this spell for a friend and she royally screwed it up. Now she's a cream colored talking cat."

"What was the spell for? This could mean some major trouble. I mean, what if she conjured a demon?"

"Are you trying to think of a way to get your butt over here so you can see Sam or is it a subconscious thing? Anyway, the spell was. . ."

Spike wrote it down for her and she replied, "it was a Latin spell to bring back a person of the past who happens to be dead."

"WHAT? She's raising the DEAD!"

"More like the dead undead, if that makes sense."

"Oh believe me, it makes a lot of sense. I'm gonna kill Spike"

Willow and Tara are heard saying "we're back," in the background.

Buffy sighed and pushed the phone toward Willow. "Emergency!"

Willow gave Buffy a strange look. "Hello?"

"Willow, thank God. Listen, Brooke turned herself into a cat and I need yours and Tara's help on getting her back to human."

"Oh, uh, we'll leave as soon as we get packed for an overnight stay."

"I hope this isn't a bad time. I'm sorry, I just don't want her parents to have to see her like this."

"It's fine. We'll be there ASAP."

"Giles says he has the book so I'm tryin to get a hold of B."

"Good."

"Hello?" an out of breath Willow answered the phone.

"Hey Red, you in a rush?"

"Yeah, on my way to Santa Monica."

"Really, could you stop by the Magic Box and grab the book I called about? Giles has it waiting for B but I'm sure he'll let you take it off his hands."

"Sure, I'll see you later. Bye."

They hung up and Faith sighed. "Something's up."

"What makes you say that?"

"Red was in a big rush to get here to Santa Monica but she didn't mention why."

"Should we go out hunting?"

"That's my girl!"

"Always."

Faith smiled and led her lover outside. The walked about four blocks when they saw something that caught their eye. It was Willow. Willow in tight black leather and a bush up bra. Faith blinked. Had Willow changed THAT much?

"Willow?"

The figure turned around and approached them. "I'm not who you think I am. She's my other self. Never thought I'd be able to play in this world again but now it looks a lot more fun. I'm gonna go play."

"Hold on a minute. Who are you?" Lily asked, grabbing the woman's arm.

Her face mutated as she pared her fangs. "Don't touch me," she growled then turned and walked away with a normal face.

Lily blinked in shock.

"I don't know what's going on but we need backup. Let's go to Nic's house."

"C'mon, you can do better than that!" Sam yelled.

"Football, what fun," Mel said as she rolled her eyes. The doorbell rang and Mel volunteered to get it. She opened the door and smiled. "Come on in beautiful lady." She led their guest into the living room. Th woman was beautiful and simply called herself Misty (bwahahahah!).

A few minutes passes and "Misty" stood in the shadows watching Mel.

One of the many drunk and high girls decided to throw herself at Mel as well as Sam.

"I'm sorry chick, I have a girlfriend," Sam confessed, giving Mel a giddy glance. So her relationship with Buffy was a little rough right now but things would eventually get better.

"So what do you say?" the girl purred, literally on top of Mel.

"I say you get off of me and find someone who's interested or equally plastered." Mel wasn't in the greatest of moods and this girl had struck the wrong nerve way too many times.

"Do I have to beg? You'd like that wouldn't you?"

Mel glared at her and pushed her off. Then came her angry Brit accent. She tended to use her British accent when she got angry. "Bugger the fuck off you bloody wanker!"

Sam, Chris and Shannon instantly became aware of the problem and Chris dragged the girl away before physical harm could be done.

"Calm down," Sam whispered and she sipped her screwdriver.

"I am calm."

"You need a drink."

"Last time I asked for a non alcoholic beverage they gave me straight rum on the rocks. No thanks."

"Ok, how about some x?"

"Uh, no."

Misty approached Mel with a grin. The music was loud but soft and she wanted to dance. She stood in front of the two chit chatting brunettes and smirked.

Sam raised a brow. "You look like my friend Willow."

"I'm her evil half," Vamp Willow replied.

"Oh, ok. Misty, right?"

"Yes. That's the only name I'll use. I can't use Willow anymore because there's already a Willow in this dimension that looks like me so I'll go by Misty."

Sam just nodded cluelessly.

"Did this visit have any purpose at all?" Mel asked.

Misty smiled. "Of course it did. I came to ask you if you wanted to dance with me."

Mel shivered and stood. "Lead the way."

Faith knocked on the door and was surprised when Tara answered it. "Faith, Lily, c-come in."

Faith and Lily joined Willow, Nicole, Spike and the cat (yes, Brooke). Faith looked around. "Where's Brooke?"

"Meow. God I hate this. Sometimes I can talk and other times I only meow. Grrrr!"

Faith started laughing. "What happened?"

"She did a spell and it kinda backfired. Hey, did you guys happen to see anything strange out there? Unusual or anything?"

Lily studied Willow's attire and blinked. She wasn't wearing the same clothes. She pointed this out to Faith and they nodded in agreement. "Strange isn't the word."

"What do you mean?" Tara asked Lily.

"We saw Willow, sorta. Uh, black leather and fangs. Not a pretty picture."

Tara gasped and looked at Willow who looked like she was ready to have heart failure.

"Oh Goddess no! Well Brooke, your spell worked the second time, only it brought Vamp Willow here instead of Drusilla."

Faith sighed. "I heard that story. Didn't you say she looked kinda gay?"

Willow blushed. "Yeah, and Angel was pointed out that vampires have traits from when they were human. It's a long story."

(flashes to Mel's room at her house)

"You wanna be bad?" Vamp Willow whispered then licked the girls neck.

"Mmmh, take me."

(Flashes back to the group)

"She can't be doing too much harm, can she?" Tara whispered.

"I'm sure she having a little "fun." She's obsessed with fun."

(Flashes back to Mel's room)

You see a brief scene with Vamp Willow and Mel under the covers, ahem.

(Flashes back to the group)

"So what do we do now?"

"Get Brooke back to normal and find Vamp Willow tomorrow."

The next day. . .

"Ah, it's great to be back! And human!" Brooke cheered. "Thank you so very much Will and Tara."

"Glad we could help," Tara replied.

"Another cloudy day, which means we cant try to find Vamp Willow now before the festivities of Christmas begin."

They all agreed and headed out the door. To their surprise Vamp Willow was only a few blocks away, standing in the street with Mel.

"Mel? Are you ok?" Lily asked quickly.

Mel smiled and kissed Misty's throat. "I'm great, minus the stomach pains."

'Shit,' Faith thought. 'She's been bitten. She hasn't had any blood yet so it can still be changed.' Faith approached with a grin. "Hey. I've got a proposition for both of you. What do you say to being human again?"

Mel smiled. "What do you think baby? It would be more fun."

Misty smirked. "And what do we give you?"

"Your word that you won't hurt innocent people and that we might just be able to be friends."

"It's a deal," the two vamps chimed.

"Good. We'll do the spell. . ."

"Once we get back to Nic's house," Willow finished.

The spell had been done and though it would take a day for things to return to normal with the ex vamps, things were looking good.

"Do any of you feel any different?" Brooke asked.

Faith nodded. "I'm not thirsty."

Mel nodded. "My stomach pains are gone."

Vamp Willow frowned. "I feel normal but I guess that's a good thing."

Lily smiled. "What are we gonna call you? It'll be a little confusing if we have two Willow's."

Vamp Willow smiled. "I solved that already. I gave myself a new name. It's Misty."

"I like," Willow chirped with a smile.

Buffy sighed as Giles drove. She had to be there for Sam. They'd been fighting on and off about the drug thing but lately things were ok. That worried the slayer. With something like addiction things didn't just become perfect and ok overnight. They reached the city limits and she heard Giles mutter something about how beautiful Santa Monica was. Buffy sighed. She could feel something was wrong, very wrong.

Sam smiled down at the blade. She popped a couple tabs of acid and slowly began to trace her wrists. Th harder she pressed, the more it tickled. Before she had the chance to realize it her wrists were spewing blood and she was laying unconscious on her white tiled bathroom flood in a pool of her own blood.

Nicole kissed Brooke softly then let her go into the palace alone. Brooke made her way up the stairs and headed for the bathroom. She found the door open and screamed at the horrid site before her eyes.

Nicole had been on the way back to her car where the others were waiting when she heard the scream. They all ran into the house to see what had happened. All of them were mortified, even the vamps. The site of blood made them sick. They really were becoming human again.

Nicole pulled Brooke close. "Shh," she cooed to the shaking blond.

"W-we n-n-need to get her to the hospital," Tara stuttered.

"Lily, get a sheet and some towels. Faith, you, Spike and Misty make room in the back seat of my car. Mel, call Jane's cell. Tara, Willow, you two see if you can find a first aide kit."

They all nodded and rushed off.

"How is she?" Jane pled.

"Samantha's a very lucky girl. She lost a great deal of blood but we have her stabilized. We also found a hazardous amount of LSD, marijuana and heroin in her system. We're keeping her overnight for observation. I've already spoken to Dr. Padilla and I recommend you see her immediately. She's a drug therapy doctor. She has helped a lot of people with this same kind of problem. She's good at what she does. I'm sorry to bring you such bad news on Christmas."

Mike held Jane close as she sobbed. "Thank you doctor," he said huskily.

Buffy panted as she appeared behind Willow. "What. ..what happened?"

"Sam tried to kill herself," Brooke whispered, not realizing it was Buffy.

"Can we see her?" Mike whispered.

"Yes. No more than three at a time."

Before Mike or Jane could even motion toward Sam's room Buffy was there, beside her angel. "Sammy, oh god. I love you so much Sammy." Buffy grasped Sam's pale hand and kissed it gently.

New Years

Buffy paced as Jane spoke with the doctor. They had decided to keep Sam in the hospital for nearly a week but the most recent incident had worried them. The first incident was when she fell out of bed and shattered her wrists. That was when they decided to keep her. She'd been doing ok since they'd fixed her wrists though she was heavily medicated and slept most of the time. From what Buffy could gather Sam had a backlash from her LSD trip and tried to kill a nurse. Apparently it took two doctors and five male nurses to restrain her. It was perfectly normal though. Waking up in a strange place with strangers poking and prodding at you. Most people would have done the same thing under those circumstance.

They were releasing her today. She'd already met with Dr. Padilla and had been referred to the best drug rehab specialist in California. One by the name of Professor Todd Simmons. He taught some sort of psychology class at a University but was better known for his work with drug addicts. It was his day job. He taught one class in the morning then it was off to his private clinic to help those who needed him most. He was a very busy man but when Dr. Padilla and Sam's parents had talked to him he made sure to schedule Sam's appointment as soon as he could. Buffy remembered the tall, slightly chubby man saying, "I'll do all I can for her but I need to know just how far you're willing to take this. What I mean is that Samantha may have to spend some time as a patient in drug rehabilitation clinic and I need to know if you, as her parent, will allow this." Buffy hated that idea. It was like giving up. Like saying there was no hope for Sam. He'd also gone on to say that he personally runs the clinic in mind and that he only allows his patients to go to that clinic, whether they were merely out patients or otherwise. Jane had replied only to say that she was willing to do ANYTHING to make her daughter better and that was when Buffy realized she had no say in this matter. It was all up to Sam and Jane now.

Buffy hated how far this whole drug thing had gone and somehow she found a way to blame herself. If only she had been there. If only she could have stopped the pain and torture Sam had been going through.

Buffy raised her head as she saw her beloved wobble to the doorway of her room. Jane signed a few papers and they were ready to go home. Buffy rushed to Sam's aide, helping her to Jane's car. This was gonna be a long New Year's Eve.

"Brookie, you can't keep doing this. Magik isn't always the answer. I understand you wanna learn but can you just try to slow down?"

"Nic, I haven't done any magik since Willow and Tara left!"

"Don't lie to me. I know you cast a few spells to make Spam better. Guess what? They didn't work. You can't just spell everything away! It doesn't work like that! It's like sweeping dust under a carpet. It doesn't go away! The problem's still there, the dirt is still there. It's not your dirt Brookie, when are you gonna see that?"

"Nic, I just thought. . ."

"Well stop thinking that way. It's time to choose Brookie. Me or magic!" With that the furious blonde headed for the door. "When you make up your mind, call. If I'm not there, you've already lost me." Then she left, tears burning her eyes as she got in her car. Brooke was doing way more than she could handle, putting not only her own life in jeopardy but those around her as well. She'd messed up quite a few spells since Willow and Tara had left and she'd done everything in her power to cover it up. Nicole was more observant than Brooke thought and she could tell when something in the air wasn't right.

She parked her car in front of Kain's house and let her head fall to the steering wheel. Saying those words were the hardest thing she'd ever had to do but if it could save Brooke from destroying herself or anybody else than it was what she had to do. Her heart was breaking and the thought of Brooke choosing magik over her didn't make it any better.

"Nic?" a soft voice whispered from the open window on the passenger side.

Nicole raised her eyes to meet Kain's concerned face. "Hey," her voice crackled.

"Hey, why don't you come in? You look like you need a friend to talk to and I just bought a gallon of "Death by Chocolate" as well as a few boxes of chocolate covered cherries. I can't eat them alone, now can I? They're screaming your name," Kain whispered with a smile of comfort.

"Chocolate covered cherries, huh? And "Death by Chocolate"? You really know how to make a girl feel better. That or make her as big as a house but who cares," she replied, opening her door and getting out of the car.

"Is everything ready?"

"Lil, chill out. Decorations up, food on the table, nearly all of the guests are here and it's 5 by 5."

"Sorry, I'm just a little frantic," the Latina whispered. Searching the room she sighed. "Where's Brooke?"

"Blondie's upstairs, I think."

"I'll go get her. They'll be here soon." Lily hurried up the stairs and knocked on Brooke's door.

"Come in."

"Hey, they'll be here soon."

"Oh, ok. I'll be down in a minute." As Lily left Brooke sighed heavily. This was just the thing she needed to get her mind off of magik and Nicole. She put on her best smile and headed downstairs.

They heard the car pull up and took their positions. When the door opened the lights came on and everyone screamed "Surprise."

That is was. Sam smiled feebly at the site of all her friends there. Even the Scooby's had made it but their were two faces she didn't see. Where were Kain and Nicole? Her eyes settled on Brooke and her smile widened. She hugged her sister with all the strength she had.

"Welcome home Sammy."

"Thanks Brooke." Sam backed up slowly. Something felt wrong. "Where's Satan?"

"Oh, uh. . .she had something to do but I'm sure she'll call."

"Ok." She looked at Josh. "And where's Kain?"

Josh smiled. "He has this thing about families he doesn't know. A fear thing. He said he'll drop by but he didn't say when."

Sam gazes at the Scoobs just in time to see Dawn sprint toward her and hug her.

"Sam, don't you ever scare us like that again. Who knows what could have happened," Dawn whispered.

Sam smiled. "Don't worry Dawn, I'm not going anywhere."

Mike smiled. "Sam, come in here. We made you dinner?"

"We?"

"Yeah. Faith, Josh, Xander and Dawn helped me out."

"Is it still kicking? Should I bring a knife with us?" Buffy joked, receiving laughter from they others.

Nicole sighed. Picking up the phone she dialed and hoped anyone but Brooke would answer.

"Hello?"

"Spam?"

"Hey Satan."

"Called to say welcome back Reader's Digest trash."

"Thanks stuck up sleaze."

They both grinned from ear to ear. "Listen, can I talk to Tara."

"Uh, sure." Sam motioned Tara to the phone and handed it to her.

"H-Hello?"

"Hey Stutter. Here's the deal. You're one of those witchy Pagan chicks, right?"

"Yes I'm a witch."

"Alright then. Brookie's getting into the whole bells, books and candles stuff and I'm cool with that but she's fucking with spells too much. I wanted to ask you a favor. Just between you, Willow and me."

"W-What kinda favor? Is she in trouble?"

"I want you two to teach her and watch her back. She's not in trouble yet but she god damn near killed all of us when she read an incantation wrong. She won't listen to me but maybe she'll listen to you and Flamey. Good fricken luck."

"I'll have to talk to Willow. I'll do all I can Nic, I promise." Tara felt for the bitch from hell. Brooke was Nic's life the same way Willow was to her. This had to stop.

"Put Spam back on. Kain wants to insult her, I mean say hi."

Tara smiled as she handed Sam the phone.

Sam raised a brow. "Hello?"

"Welcome back Journalist from hell."

"Thanks fudge packer."

"Tell the others hi for me."

"K." They hung up and Sam relayed the message.

Tara approached her girlfriend and pulled her away from the other Scooby's. "Willow, we need to talk."

"It wasn't me," Willow pled humorously.

"This is serious," Tara whispered.

Willow frowned as her face became serious. "What's wrong? Demon? Vamps?"

"Brooke."

"Huh?" Willow murmured, completely baffled.

"She's delving into dark magik Willow."

"Dark? Uh oh. That's really bad. Wait, who told you this?"

"Nicole. She sounded like she'd been crying Will. She said Brooke's doing too much and she wants us to help by teaching Brooke. She said we have a better chance of getting Brooke's attention than she did."

Willow sighed. It wasn't like their powers were completely under control and they were still working to harnessing power. How where they suppose to teach Brooke? "How? How are we gonna teach her when we don't even completely grasp the concept of harnessing our power?"

"We'll have to teach her what we know. We can work together to learn."

Willow nodded. "Should I or do you wanna?"

"I can."

Willow joined Buffy and Sam in the kitchen as Tara sat beside Brooke on the stairs.

"Brooke, you wanna talk about it?"

"Not really."

"Ok. Have you done any spells since last time?"

"Yeah but I screwed them up."

"Oh. That's probably because you haven't learned how to harness your power."

"How do I learn?" Brooke beamed, excited.

"Willow and I can help. We can learn together if you want."

"Like a coven type thing?"

"Yeah but you have to promise not to do magik without us."

"I promise. How long are you staying here?"

"Until school starts again."

"Cool. You and Will can stay here if you want. I'm sure Dad and Jane won't mind."

"I'll ask Willow."

What do you say? Does it suck too bad? I know it's all cheery and crap but "there's a calm before the storm" so keep that in mind. Drugs never just let go ::winks::
~<>~ Mel ~<>~

Brief Interlude

How could things have turned out so dark? Sam had been sent to that rehab center and Brooke had made her choice. It wasn't Nicole. She sat on her bed with her knees pulled comfortingly to her chest as she gazed out the window into the black sea of nothingness most humans would call night. Sam had been sent to rehab and she felt horrible inside because she'd been so vicious to the poor girl in the past. She blamed herself really. Only a little but the guilt was still there. As far as the situation with Brooke went, her mind was telling her to get over it quickly yet her heart just wouldn't let go. She loved her with all of her pathetic existence and the aching in her soul gave her little faith. Brooke would come around eventually but would Nic be too far gone? She was going crazy without her and nothing seemed to help her pass the time. After all, it had been a month already.

She reflected on the day of that fight. After Kain had hung up with Sam they had gone to a high class party but didn't stay very long. They played pool for a while then went to a gay bar to lose themselves. She vaguely remembered six or seven women approaching her and asking her if she wanted to take them home. They didn't say it so bluntly but that's what they'd wanted. There was only one she actually sat down and talked with. Kain was dancing with this friend of his named Richie when she'd met Alyssa. She was a sweetheart. She could tell Nic needed a friend or at least a shoulder to cry on and she helped her. Most people wouldn't have, considering her rep at Kennedy, but Aly didn't care about that. They'd talked for hours about anything and everything. It was kinda crazy how they became friends overnight.

Aly was gonna stop by this evening. She knew the kind of toll it took on ones heart when their only love embraced something else besides them. She knew because she'd lost her last girlfriend to alcohol. "She drowned herself in pity and sorrow, saw the world in venomous shades of pessimism. It. . .she let it consume her, feed on her til nothing was left. I saw her suffer, tried to help and nearly died sitting next to her in that Mercedes," Nic remembered Aly saying. Today was yet another hard day but she'd lived. She knew she couldn't get over it and that she would lay there broken until Brooke had enough of a brain to realize what she'd done and fix it. Fix her.

The knock on the door sounded more like a soft humming, a numb kind of sound to the blonde's ears at first. She rose and headed down the stairs with a drained look in her eyes. The butler had been given the day off. Opening the door weakly she looked up to find Aly. "Hey. Come in." She stepped out of the woman's path and used what energy she did have to sit down in her living room. She didn't know why she felt so weak though she suspected it was the thick, dark depression that had seeped into her soul. Well, what was left of her soul anyway.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Sam peered out the window and smiled. She'd been here a little less than a month and already she was feeling a bit better. She'd actually met a friend here. Her name was Amber. They hung out when they had free time. The doc had them busy most of the time.

The past month had been ok. This clinic was between Santa Monica and Sunnydale so both her family and friends had been able to visit her. Buffy visited once a week but all Sam could think about was getting the hell outta this place. She wanted out. She wondered if she could get along in the real world but she had a feeling she could if Buffy was there.

She thought back on the first day she'd been here. She walked in and spotted the short brunette in the corner. Dr. Simmons told her to socialize and she ended up talking to Amber until lights out. This place was like a prison but having a friend on the inside made it more bearable. Amber was great. She was an ecstasy addict and had only been there a day longer than Sam. She introduced Sam to Anime. That's what they talked about. Amber would tell her about the different Animes and the characters in each one. Sam's personal favorites were Vegeta and Sailor Saturn. She was really getting into this Anime thing.

She saw herself in Tomoe Hotaru's eyes like a pure reflection of the black cynicism within her yet the mirror did have another side. The side that was loving but was buried by the darkness. She hadn't seen that side since she'd left Sunnydale and gone back to Kennedy. That was when she'd stopped caring. Soon it wasn't about her anymore, it was about the drugs and the need. Dr. Simmons had helped her greatly now that she reflected on the subject. He showed her ways to deal with all of the pain and he'd put her on an anti depressant a few days ago. It did help but the real test would be on the outside.

"Sam?"

Sam turned from the window now, her eyes following the doctor as he drew closer to her. "Yeah?"

"I've decided on your release date but you'll have to spend a little more time with me because it's only about a week away. Can you do that?"

"What day? I can do anything if I want to."

"Valentine's Day." Dr. Simmons led her into a room and closed the door. "Sam, you're doing very well but there's still work to be done. First I'd like to try and draw out what's tormenting you through hypnosis. Your mom has already signed away the decision but I'd like to hear an ok from you because it wouldn't be worth it if you didn't cooperate. You've already hit rock bottom, now it's time to get back up and try again."

Sam pondered for a moment. She knew what he meant. There was something wrong inside. It wasn't the drugs, she could tell. The only thing they hadn't tried was hypnosis and she just wanted the crawling under her skin to go away. "Ok."

"Good. I'll sign you up for tomorrow."

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

Everything was so drab these days. The only thing she had was her Willow and she was content with that but seeing the others suffer as they did broke her heart every time. Buffy had gotten a job but she didn't really like it much. She worked herself to death. She was in her office from 6-7 a.m. to 5-6 p.m. and then it was demon bashing time. Not to mention she was taking care of Dawn. They were all taking care of Dawn.

Xander was working overtime just to save a little money while Anya was setting everything up for their wedding. Yup, they'd gotten engaged and now it was time to start planning. As a matter of fact, tomorrow the bride's maids had to get fitted for their dresses.

Willow was doing ok. She was a little slowed down by her non-stop schedule but she was ok. She'd taken time from everything else just to spend a little time with her girl but the tension was still rising. Not between them but in the Hellmouth all together. There's a calm before the storm and this storm felt really bad.

"Mmmmh, you're so good to me."

Tara blushed, her hands gently easing the tension from her lover's shoulders. "I try," she whispered, placing a soft kiss on Willow's neck.

"Don't try too hard," Willow purred like kitten getting its ears scratched.

Tara's head snapped toward the door as she heard screaming and then a soft knock on their door. Moving in with Buffy had been a leap into the unknown and the fights were awful. "Hang on a minute," she yelled, staring down at Willow.

Willow turned over, pouting with her lip quivering just a little. Realizing that wasn't working she stretched, arching her back so her bare chest would catch the fleeting attention of the blonde.

Tara felt her pulse race at the simple gesture. It had been way too long. With their schedules as hectic as they were they always seemed to be too tired but they weren't now. Forgetting for a moment that somebody was at their door she placed a soft kiss on Willow's lips.

Dawn sighed, gently pushing the door open just a crack. Her eyebrows flared as she took in the site before her. 'Woah,' she thought, contently watching as the witches continued.

Willow kissed back gently letting her hands trace Tara's sides. Her fingertips slid slowly over her lover's nipples, teasing them with an agile grace. One arm wrapped around the blonde, bringing her as close to Willow as she could be with clothes on. Willow looked into those beautiful eyes that stared down at her and saw that familiar spark she'd missed so much. Her hands returned to caressing Tara's sides, though they were under the blonde's sweater this time.

Tara could feel the pure essence of what they felt. She could only describe it as pure, warm and gentle. She let Willow remove her sweater and giggled when her girlfriend tickled her playfully. These peaceful, loving moments were what made life bearable. She lost herself as she kissed the red head passionately, only briefly noticing her lover had unsnapped her bra. She slowly broke the kiss and sat up.

Willow stared up at her angel and let her hands move over Tara's shoulders, slipping the silk straps away as she'd done a thousand times before yet it still seemed like it was their first time. Easing the soft material off, she let it fall to the floor. She bit her bottom lip innocently, her body throbbing at the sight of those luscious mounds within her grasp.

Dawn looked like she was about to have a stroke. Her eyes were wide and clearly very focused on the nice home movie taking place before her. Her mouth was gaping, though she hadn't realized that just yet and it was a mystery how long she'd been slack jawed. Then there was this hot, aching feeling throughout her body. Now, being a teenager she knew everything there was to know about sex (well, at least she thought she did, like every normal teen) but for some reason she couldn't grasp this concept. It wasn't that she didn't know about homosexuals, it was that she herself was turned on by this intimate moment and she couldn't find a reason why. That wasn't what bothered her the most, however. She knew both of these women very well and still she was sitting there watching them make love. This thought made her feel guilty but she didn't turn away. There was plenty of time for guilt later.

Tara knew what the other Wiccan wanted, and she was more than happy to give it to her. She leaned forward, her breasts now in Willow's face. Willow smiled briefly then took one hard nub of flesh into her mouth, suckling delicately as she tentatively caressed the other. Tara gasped, her eyes shutting tight as Willow's free hand undid her skirt.

Dawn was near the point of drooling. She was so fixated on the couple's actions that she didn't hear Buffy leave.

Willow pulled the material off gently, staring at her lover's body in amazement. Tara still amazed her. She kissed Tara's bare stomach, flipping both of them over so that she was now on top. Kissing her lover passionately she tugged those familiar cotton panties off, her fingers crawling through those blonde curls.

Dawn finally pried herself from her position and stumbled back to her room, feeling as though she'd intruded enough.

-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-

"Sam, can you hear me?"

"Yes."

"We're going to go back to when this problem began. When was that Sam?"

"When we moved in with Mike."

"What happened?"

"He's trying to replace my dad. I don't see what mom sees in him and I have to live with Brooke. She's trying to be my friend."

"That makes you angry, doesn't it Sam? They're trying to make you fit in but you don't want to, do you?"

"No. I want them to leave me alone."

"When did it get worse?"

"Nicole and Brooke dating."

"And what made you angry about that?"

"They have each other. I have nothing. Mom has Mike, Lily has Carmen, Brooke has Satan and I have nothing."

"But then you met Buffy, didn't you?"

"Yeah. I left her. Alone. I had to. I cried for weeks."

"She called, didn't she?"

"It's not enough. I need her with me. She completes me."

"But you couldn't have her with you. What happened Sam?"

"I had nothing again. They all had their souls but mine was taken away."

"How?"

"I fell into a trap and couldn't get out."

"Trap?"

"Yeah. They seduced me. It was fun at first but then. . .then it consumed me."

"What consumed you?"

"The drugs."

"And how did you come into contact with these drugs?"

"Friends."

"We're they your friends?"

"No."

"What were they?"

"Mindless twits. They gave me a taste of death."

"Death?"

"Yes. I was dead inside. No more pitiful emotions to make me feeble and senseless."

"So you felt nothing?"

"Nothing at all. It was like being a vampire. Soulless and immortal."

"Did you enjoy feeling this way?"

"I didn't feel anything. I want my soul back."

"You have your soul Sam. You need to learn to feel again. Do you want to learn?"

"Yes."

"When you look at drugs you'll remember how it felt to be empty, to be dead inside. Do you wanna feel dead again Sam?"

"No."

"When I count to three and snap my fingers you'll snap out of the hypnosis and remember nothing beside the release of your repressed emotions and you will slowly begin feeling again." Dr. Simmons counted to three and snapped his fingers.

Sam opened her eyes, peering at the doctor. "Did it work?"

"You tell me."

Sam thought about that for a moment then gave him a perplexed look. Had it worked? She didn't feel any different but maybe this wasn't the type of thing that worked automatically. She sat up. "Thanks doc."

"You're welcome Sam."

And for the first time in months Sam smiled.